| Wednesday, May 21, 2008 |
| yox... for last week, nothing much happen... it is just a week of tears and scoldings... loud quarrels between my mum and bro... which affect me alot.... scoldings from piano teacher.... people miunderstood my friend because of me.... sad....sad....sad... anyway i hope that this week will be much better.... haha... anyway i spent this year vesek day in different way... haha... normaly stayed at home but this year differs.... early in the morning meet up with zhi xian to go visit one of my senior at NUH... sian lor on the way there and back ... i kena shaun like siao... but i know he joking de lar... haha... oh yea i did not know i have arm muscle lor.... haha.... sian .... anyway when at NUH... we gave him the macmuffin that zhixian bought... haha... oh yea i sort of broke the hashbrown in two... but it was on purpose k.... zhixian kept claiming that i did it on purpose... haha.... looking at my senior so weak .... though i don't know him much... somehow i feel sad and helpless too... i want to help but i don't know how to.... i really wished that he will be given the fighting spirit to fight through this tough battle... besides him.... i saw other paitients in the same ward too... one of them is also a youngster.... why must youngster face such a tough battle.... haix.... i guess when something wants to fall on you.. you have no choice but to accept it and fight on.... anyway... after visiting him... i had to rush off for pw.... sian lor... pw.... we kena chased out so many time... went to mac.... they say no studying.... then went to KFC... there is no power coming out from the powerpoint.... so went to cc.... who knows it is closed on vesek day... then we went back to mac... so some paper work.... then went to bowling alley to type.... haha.... so noisy lor... oh yea... so sorry pw group... i cant contribute much.... i am so sorry... anyway i went off about 5 going to 6... walking aimlessly at heartland mall... bought ice cream and enjoying it while walking and waiting for my ride... haha.... dats is the end of my vesek day... haha.... done some thinking... realise i had many to think through.... ever since this year start... i did not really use my brains and eyes to face this world.... i basically based on my own feelings.... thus ... somehow i misunderstood, i offend some people, make people angry.... i am really sorry... but i know nothing can reverse it back.... from now i will use my brain to think through first before deciding on things... i used to analysis quite alot... however i find it tiring... so i stop it this year... but somehow i cant do that... i not sure lar... haix.... dance... ballet dance... should i quit .... i am not sure.... i am not sure if i quit will my studies and piano be better... or it will not make much a difference... i really not sure... i love dance alot.... but haix.... i know, in life sacrifices are needed to be made but it is really a tough decision... so this week i have thought of the pros and cons.... it seems that i have quite a clear decision... but somehow i am reluctant to choose that decision.... haix.... when can i come to terms ..... last week taught me something... is it that in life, things may not always goes the way you want it to be and also history repeats itself.... unexpected things happen... sometimes it can suprise you and make your day... but sometimes it will give you a shock and make you cry.... somehow i feel like running from everything... living in a world filled with self-denial .... but i realise i had to wake up.... faced it and move on... currently i am doing so.... but it is tough... tough.... stress level will go up and i know my family members will be affected which i wished it will not be the case... oh yea also time wait for no man.... once the chance is gone... it will be gone forever... so to all people... if you see a chance in anything... grab it quick and treasure it... don't lose it... i did not treasure my chance and now i regret... but what to do... i think the worse thing is i commit the mistake twice... i allow history to repeat twice... i hope after this incident i will learn and not to commit again.... haix... what a waste.... lets hope that this week will be a better week for everyone... hope that everyone will live their life to the fullest with no regrets.... oh yea and to all J2s in SRJC... jia you and gd luck.... do not stress yourself too much and tak care.... all the best... :)..... |