feli's world

2009-04-08T03:58:00.004+08:00

Here to put up a pic.... words and pic specially done by me... haha.... anyway life has gone through a little change... but right now.... my focus will still be on studies... pia my studies... i had to meet my aim of 60 above for mid year... shall blog more when june comes... cya.... :).....

`Mind like the sky....

2009-03-13T11:14:00.001+08:00

Common test are over…. Glad that it is over… but fear of getting the results now… I know I did not really study for this common test… did not have the mood actually… haix… but I promise myself not to let the same thing happen for mid years ler… I must work hard….

Recently… some personal problem arise…. Though I try to keep my emotions aside and stay focus… I cannot really do so… felt lost… did not know what should I do… but after the long ride home yesterday… I decided I really should let it go… I really should just stop thinking of it… I should divert all these hopeless to my strength for studying… instead on pondering a problem that cannot solve in the near future... why not I work on something more practical… like getting myself to a uni… getting to a course I want… I really do not want to feel regret…. Haix… but I really dunnoe what wrong with my life… for PSLE year, Olvl year and now As… I have to face the same prob…. I really wish I can wake up and pull myself up much earlier this year… much earlier than two years ago…

To all my friends… thanks for adding joy to my life these few weeks… really appreciate… haha… sorry never share much with u all… but I believe I can settle on my own and this kind of prob is better if I deal it by myself…. Anyway thanks for all the support… laughter… and fun times….

Lastly this is something I wrote long ago… decided to put it up now…it is something I felt last year…

I will always love you
No matter what
Even if you love another girl
My heart will always be you

I will always be your guardian angel
Protecting you from afar
Standing by you everytime
I will continue loving you

Thinking of you every hour
Missing you every minute
Worried about you every second
This is how much I love you

Seeing you with another girl
Breaks my heart
But i will never break yours
Only give you all blessings to you
This is how much I love you

That a love called sacrifice
That why I decided
To protect you from afar
To support you anytime
Showing how much I love you

But this year i decide to...

2009-03-01T08:52:00.003+08:00

life has been normal but fast pace these days... normal in the sense that nothing much really happen... however, days are passing very fast... studies are going on in a fast pace too.... because of many recent activities i took part.... it's been tough for me to catch up... moreover, i had somehow lose my motivation to study recently... not only studies... practically lose motvation to do anything... to work hard to achieve something... how come fel turn out like this... i really do not know...

anyway had a great cry after got scolded by instructor for not dancing well... i know that and it is all due to not enough practise... sorry mr dan.... i will practise harder and improve next time... however... i cry not because he scolded me... but cause of the stress level i have from work... the inability to have the motivation to study... to even try to do so... i kept wondering where did the old fel go... has she disappear... has the workaholic fel left.... i really wish she will come back... i terrbily need her this year...

someother things has somehow bother me recently... and i hope that these thoughts will be gone... or at lest be kept deep in my brain till As are over...

lastly, thanks to all friends and juniors for comforting me and support me...

2009-02-08T11:01:00.003+08:00

long time no blog... have been very busy and stress up lately... it is only first month of school... but i am feeling the stress ler... though work load seems to be lesser than J1... but lesson are so packed that u do not get much break to help to complete homework... and lesson end so late ... by the time i get home... i am too tired to do anything... sian... this call for greater need of time management which is what i am very weak in... sian... also i need to monitor my stress level... health isn't good ler.. if i get too stress, my body might just break down... haha... so fel must remain calm and happy....

this year, i really wish my family members will understand my needs... hoping that they will support my decision... if i made any very wrong choice... talk to me like having a discussion... i can forsee that this year my chances of having emotional break down will be greater and more frequent... i really hope and wish not to be sandwiched in between anymore... my cous told me that in order to break free i need to rebel... but i don't think this is a good way... i do not want my parents to ignore me totally too... maybe you may say i am not ready to be free... but i just feel that rebelling is not a good way... it is tiring too... but till now i am finding a better way... hope i can the answer soon....

anyway... on a happier tone... first five days of acad orientation end... haha.. c7 is great... love them lots... haha happy to see them bonded together... but very sad that they had to split up soon... sian... hope that next week we can get together and take a group pic... haha...

2009-01-07T21:34:00.000+08:00

Hey… its 7jan…. haha yesterday I officially turn into 18… legal age ler… can smoke, drink and many more… haha… but nah I am not going to drink or smoke lar… haha… dislike the bitter taste in alcoholic drinks and the smoke from cigarettes… haha… anyway… today going to thanks people and report my three birthday celebrations… though not grand… but I love it… haha….

K start off with thanks first…. Thanks all peeps who wish me….(in no order)

Samuel
David
Alwin
Junyi
Minli
Vanessa
Christopher
Jasmine
Michelle
Leonard
Daron
Maxine
Vivian
Violet
Rachelle
Sok Loon
Dilys
Hui Ying
Shu yi
Clara
Lynn lee
Joanna Chua
Denis Ho
Wirda Syazwani
Jin Kai
Zhi Xian

Sorry if I have left out anyone…. Thanks for all the wishes….

First celebration…. I will give credits to my childhood friends and family… haha... on Sunday… went to pasir park… cycle a bit… haha… was sick so kind of tired… after wards talk to dad for quite some while… then went to elias mall to eat… haha… the food super delicious… thanks dilys for choosing… you yan kuang… haha... thanks the ong family for the bd gift… haha….

Then on Monday…. Haha… went back school for ogl walk-in practice… haha… my group super funny… initially no idea what pose… but out of sudden dave shouted titanic… so in the end doing some titanic pose… the boys going to shout : u jump, I jump… haha….
Later in the evening… 1s09 having class bbq… haha… meet Vannessa at hougang then went to parkway parade together… haha… meet Bernice there… then went to cold storage and giant to shop for additional stuff…haha… have a hard time gettinga cheap brush… haha… then took taxi to ecp.. haha… reach there… and the sky was not positive… luckily in the end was ok…. Haha… start fire quite some time… ky did not really know how… haha… fire took about 2 hours before it was ready to bbq anything… haha…

In the night, the class surprise me and jas with birthday cake… haha… thanks tricia for the cake… haha… sang bd song and cut cake…. Haha… I san for jas and she sang for me… haha… took many pics… and talk all night… haha… was back home about midnight… but it was fun… thanks 1s09… haha….

On actual day… 6 jan… went school again for ogl… haha… luckily no one know it was my bd… if not I would have spray paint all over me… haha… that night after tuition, went back home to cut cake with family… haha…. cake was not bad… bro took very nice pics of me and cake… will post it some time… haha….

2009-01-03T08:32:00.003+08:00

it is the third day in 2009.... haha... k going to blog some past, present and future....

recently, i went to visit my grandma.... omg... when i saw her, i was so heartbroken.... she was so skinny... and she cannot control her right leg... and her left arm cannot bend... also she forgets most of us... but i know she is trying real hard to remember... she manage to recall me and my younger bro.... and she had never forget my dad... haha... because this son-in-law of hers always will buy her cigarette in the past.... haiz..... her memory stop at two years ago.... cause when ask her to guess me and bro age... she said mine was 15... haixx..... anyway brought her out to the nearby coffee shop.... then my bros and I push her back first before the rain start pouring... while my aunt and mum went to buy her fav waffle.... oh yea.... and when we were about to go... she ask from us 2 dollars to buy cigargette.... haha... my bro play along and put "2 dollars" in her hand.... she put it inside her pocket.... and claims she has "four dollars" inside now.... i really hope she can get well, eat more..... 婆婆，我爱你....

for my last moment in 2008... it was spent in clarke quay.... haha... it was the second time i was at clarke quay in that hour... haha.... but my first time celebrating new year there.... ok.... it was fun as it has the qi fen.... but then you had to squeeze, squeeze and squeeze.... which is something i don't quite like.... haha.... before the countdown.... we were stationed at fashion bar.... but all the kids went to walk around in clarke quay.... talk and walk... haha.... stop at the bungee jumping for a while... since can't sit.... my bro wanted to watch.... haha... then for the countdown.... the kids were near the stage within the crowd.... haha... got quite alot of "snow" on my back... haha.... balloons drop from above and many went to burst it... haha.... ironically.... it did not sound like balloon burst but more like fireworks... at the same time.... marina bay let out the fireworks.... haha.... it was an amazing view.... haha... oh yea that day the msg was jam around 10 pm... 2 hours before midnight... so early lor....

goodbye 2008 and hello 2009.... haha... a new year... a new beginning.... i hope that i can start anew.... and my very first policy is to ace my As.... get into healthcare courses in uni.... next, to be less hot-tempered at home.... third, brush up my comunication skills with people.... forth, able to dance to the music... no matter how fast it is.... and something that i should accomplish long ago is TO MANAGE TIME.... but most importantly is to stay calm and happy...

i want to thank for everything that happen in 2008... be it happy or sad... thanks for all the friend i meet and made.... thanks for all the lesson to be learn.... thanks for all the experience i gain... thanks everyone who are helping me in anyway... thanks for all the memories that i can keep....

time fly real fast.... it is the year of As now....

Spring, Summer
Autumn, Winter
Different seasons
As years goes by

Sun lit the day
And moon shines at night
Settings change
As time passes by

2008-12-28T11:31:00.003+08:00

haha... 9 more days to 18 years old ler... haha... anyway this year christmas was spend very differently...

On christmas eve... my family and dilys' family went to eat taiwan porridge... and late sat mrt to somerset... got down and walk all the way to lucky plaza... haha... on the road... saw all the lightnings.... oh by the way... is it my first time coming to orchard for christmas... haha... anyway saw many people had "snow" fight... was caught in a couple of fights too... haha... youngest bro and mum was scared of the "snow".... i told them it is only soap... can wash off de... but they still scared... anyway wanted to cross the underpass to wisma... and see what's happening there... cause it seems to have a stage and some performance... however... the police cornered off the place and we had to make a big turn... sian... in the end miss the countdown.... haha.... so later took train back to yio chu kang lor.... oh yea... ivan bro had an idea to random greet people merry christmas... haha... in the end we greeted the people on the train lor.... haha... oh yea that day... he took up to 53 pics... haha amazing... but most of it are lame and random shots... haha....

On christmas... mum, two bros and me clear up the store room... sort out the stuff that want to give to the salvation army and one of my neighbours' daughter... haha...i was assgined to dust off the things... but then my poor nose is allergic to dust... hehe... bro then gave me a "kou zhao" to wear... it works... did not have cold after the cleaning... anyway clear things off.... and found out we bought lots of soft toys... haha... so donated those to the salvation army ler... but we left some toys... so that if my dear nephews and nieces come they can play.... haha...
the day after christmas... we all went to put all our donation to the box at marina.... haha...

watch "bedtimes stories" yesterday... it was not bad... haha very hilarious... the guniea pig sure have very big eyes... haha... anyway have some take away in the movie.... a story can have happy ending... it all depends how you write.... so one's life should be the same... it all depends what is your choice and whether you want it to end happily....

will be visiting my grandma later... hope she still remember me and my family... very long never see her ler...

2008-12-23T12:52:00.001+08:00

Haha… so long then blog again… been busy on tour and camp…. Haha… from 15-17dec I had Xperience pharmacy camp…. Oh it was awesome… had lots of fun… learn a lot too… from 18-20 dec… I was at port Dickson… there was quite fun… but the travelling takes up a lot of time… so did not play much….

Xperience Pharmacy camp….

Day 1…
Meet vannessa and denis around 7.15 at hougang station… haha… I was the earliest…unexpectedly… hehe… anyway went to buona vista station to meet up with the rest… haha… so long never saw my dear gwen ler… had some catching up with gwen all the way till we split to our groups… haha… then so qiao met four other zhss peeps there too… was same group with ivy(zhss) and ky… haha… ogl was interesting and they are a fun lot… love them… shu yi, lai wei and clara… haha… anyway that day we had dosage form lab session and a few talks about NUS pharmacy… at night we played 8* pharmacist game… very fresh stations games… haha… for supper we had roti prata at pasir pajang… ogl treat us… thanks ogl… J….

Day 2…
Og 7 was more bonded… haha… again had 7 talks by famous people in pharmacy circle… and a workshop by the seniors… later was dispensing lab sessions…. Haha… made medicine for cure of diarrhea for kids and adults… haha… night was game again… it is solving a mystery… this game is awesome… made u want to find out the truth… going around questioning people and gather clue like detective… not bad… haha… I pei fu the game organizer… great job…. Supper was mac… wanted to treat the ogl back de... but they dun wan… anyway play till the next morning… erm I slept only for 3 hrs I think… haha…

Day 3…
Pack up… more cam whore… and back home ler… haha… meeting on 30 dec again… hope most of us can turn up…

Port Dickson…

First day spent on bus travel… night went to eat seafood dinner and later karaoke… haha as usual… my family sang again… my mum’s friend loves to see and hear us sing… haha… especially hear my dad see zhuo hua jian songs… haha… sian they do not have my fav K song “ye zi”… so sang all the old eng and chi songs… haha....

Second day… went to go kart… wow it was awesome… had never sat go kart before… I was so afraid at first… so first few rounds go very slow… but then… speed all the way… haa… bro said it is faster than escape de… haha… yippee now if go escape will not be afraid to go kart ler… then later went to play paintball… actually wanted to play battle field de… but then must be above 18 and min 6 people… though some can fake through the age but still not enough people… sianzzz….. so played the shooting range de lor… no choice… then went to play archery… heyhey…I hit bull eye… the last shot… so tyco lor… haha… but after playing arms super pain… need lots of strength… haha….

Oh yea after playing everything… we waited for the hotel van that we hired earlier on… we waited for so long lar… waited about 3 hours… erm I was not angry… but all the rest was furious mad ler… waited so long there and got so many mosquito bite… haha… they said they were busy and lost their way… haha… after the three days in PD… I realize the cabbies there… don’t know their places well at all… and PD not bigger than sing lor…

Anyway after that… gals went for full body massage while the boys went to crab fish… haha… full body massage was shuang… haha….heard many “cracks” after the massage… haha… oh yea the person who massage me don’t believe my weight when I told her… she said it should be lower around 30 plus… haha… I told her heavy bones she still don’t believe… haha… hmm mum told her I was complain shoulder ache… so she gave me more massage on my shoulder… so nice of her… haha…

Next morning… took bus back to sing ler lor… and I think I saw someone from zhss in the bus… but did not dare to ask… haha

2008-12-06T08:59:00.002+08:00

yox.... back from sydney safe and sound... haha.... sydney is super fun... interesting... weather super cold and windy.... but last few days had temperature like Singapore.... anyway visited many places... the sydney opera house, blue mountains and three sisters, limstone cave, sydney university, UNSW.... had jazz, comptemp and ballet dance classes... went for perfert partners talk manon performance and another one in UNSW.... hmm... many things happen and change in this trip... learn alot too... haha... oh yea got closer with some of the dancers too... love them lots.... haha.... will upload photos when i get them.... haha....

sian i think my health getting worse.... i don't know if it is due to me not eating much meat during the trip.... cause last day was quite dizzy and can't really breathe properly... sian i hope i can get well soon.... till now i still don't dare to see a doctor... sian....

2008-11-28T17:47:00.004+08:00

haha... last post before going to sydney... haha... i cant believe i am going to sydney ler... yay.... hope i have fun there...

anyway... went out the whole day yester day.... meet ber and gwend at tpy interchange at 9... sorry i was late... reach there only almost at 10... sorry gals... went there ate breakfast at subway... then went off to buy ingredients to bake... haha... shop at 2 NTUC and later went popular too.... cause gwend want to buy highlighter... that highlighter colour very solid lor... want to buy one too... but sian not enough money... haha...anyway after shopping went back to interchange and fetch tricia... haha... then went to ber house to bake... haha... baking is so fun.... haha... tricia say i power pack de... sieve the powder so fast... hahaha... after baking did some icing...so tough lor... but inthe end manage too... haha... thanks ber, tricia and gwend for letting me take the first few batches... after that... ber still offer her wrapping and a paper bag to me... so nice... thanks gal.... they waited the bus with me.... then i took bus to meet sherry at tpy station...

haha... met sherry then go bugis to meet pm... haha... she so late lor... waited her for half and hour... haha... she still own both of us bubble tea... haha... anyway went to sakae to have buffet... wah it was so full... i so long never eat buffet in resturants ler lor... like about 10 years... haha... anyway enjoy myself... oh yea... gave them the muffins i bake specially for them... but sherry's muffin the icing come off ler... sad... haha...

k after buffet... went to meet mum to buy some clothes for sydney... need to have another set of clothes for the opera house... haha... cause they say cannot wear jeans... but after i bought... shush told me can ler... sian... oh well... new clothes for next year lor... haha... oh yea... i manage to shop for 2 hours... wah wat a achievement... haha normally i hate shopping one...

here the muffins pics...

`before into the oven.....

`wah la out from oven ler...

`ta da.... final product.....

2008-11-27T02:31:00.000+08:00

Haha… taking a break from packing… sian hate it… can’t find something to wear for Sydney opera house… oh well guess tmr got to go shopping again…. But erm as a gal I dun like shopping…. Weird right… but haha this also means my bf dun really need to pei me shopping ler… haha… k anyway blog about wat happen lately…

Saturday…
Went to watch madascar… haha… very funny… laugh all the way… but erm the show no plot de… haha… still worth the $ lar…. Lol all the way… haha…. oh yea before the movie… went to pepper lunch and eat… haha… so qiao… pm’s friend was serving me…haha… it is a small world… haha…

Sunday
Last time of fun before bro and dad go to Vietnam and shanghai respectively… haha… first went to eat teochew porridge… near srjc de… haha… then we went off to tp safra club… haha… laugh a lot on the way… took kpe… but so sian had to go on 70 miles per hour… so slow lor… and there got so many cams… we get so tired of the speed… so make a way out… but then exit too early… sort of lost our way… luckily got dad… haha… I laugh until want to vomit ler lar..haha… anyway play darts, pool, table soccer and hockey… had a great fun… haha…

Monday
Haha… a day with Singapore changi airport… haha…. morning went to T2 departure to send bro off… he is going to Vietnam… sian…. Miss him sooo much…. Anyway met quite a few of my teachers there…. So long never meet them ler… oh yea I have yet to visit ms tan… she kept asking me to go back zhss… haha… but sian I very busy lor… next year will be worse…. Haha… after sending bro… whole family went to eat mac… then I went to school… as usual school is boring… haha… at night I went to airport again… this time is T3…. And sending my dad off…. Went around to see… haha… not bad… love the ceiling… haha… oh yea saw some dancers practicing there too… so cool… all of them are guys… and they dance super good… one turn about 4 times…. Ah… so jealous…. I cant turn a proper 2 lor… sian… must train ler… gal jia you…. Haha… after dad went in… we went to “wang” to have our supper… haha…

Tuesday
Sad… last day of school… the day when I know my j2 class… sad…. My class split like siao… 7 in 2s06… 4 in 2s07 and 7 in 2s08…. Sian sian…. All my close friends in another class… when received this news I was very very upset… but I suppress it… gwen was complaining to me…. Sort of console her… and pei her go to her ct venue before I left to enter mine…. Why… why must I be separated with my close friends again… I am tired of making new friends… sian… whole day not really have mood lar… went super high… hoping it will cover away my sadness… all my “she be de”….

Wednesday
Yea… today… last dance lesson before Sydney trip… omg… it was torturing…. But haha… fun and enjoyable… haha… mr dan stretch me a lot today… haha… did know I can stretch that much… haha… but then it was so pain till I had to inhale and exhale like a pregnant lady giving birth… haha… leg went wobbly after that lor… but really felt stretch… thanks mr dan… haha… after dance …. Went back home to pack my luggage…. Haha… and till now still packing…

K lar… got to go packing again ler… if not tmr cant go baking and buffet ler… cya around….

2008-11-19T23:52:00.001+08:00

Long tym no blog…. K last Saturday went to celebrate my niece bd… haha… she is so shy lor… anyway met her brother… so cute lor… laugh so easily too… haha… my relatives say I can be a good nanny… haha… dots…. Haha I do intend to be a paediatrician… hope I can… but of course must do super well for As first… haha…

Saturday was pe outdoor day too… haha miss my dear heda… so long never see her ler… oh yea it was her bd too… hey gal sorry … I can’t celebrate your birthday that day…. But promise will make it up…. Anyway my last time see most of the s9 peeps… love them lots… haha… my group was so enthu can… we run from station to station… cheer like nobody business… enjoy a lot…haha…. love s9… they rocks… oh yea… thanks to all my group member… I remembered one station… I cannot tahan spin on the sloping sand… super dizzy and fell many times… almost going to faint ler… but I can hear clearly all your encouragement… thanks a lot… :)…. haha…

Then Sunday I went to prawning… haha sian did not catch much… but kena bit by many mosquito… haha… oh yea and some other people do not like prawns… so they give to us… haha… then went to ta bao food and went back home…

Sorry for this short post… will try to post longer one next time… haha…

2008-11-10T22:59:00.002+08:00

Long time no see my dear blog… haha… hooray OP is over…. DONE WITH PW…

Haha…. Anyway talk abit about pw… erm… very disappointed… I tremble today… it is so jia lat lar… sian… but then hear from audience… my presentation not bad… hmm… I dun really have that confidence… but thanks all compliments… haha… then q and a… I did not elaborate much… haha… but oh well… it is over and I know I tried my best… hope there is a B… but chances is very low…

Sian tmr need to start supplementary lesson ler… just finished PW… now is other subs… haha… seems like no rest for me… haha… oh well… anyway… I have decided to work very very hard…. And I need to do so… firstly I am not smart…. Second… I intend to go to a very demanding course in NUS… I intend to study medicine Science… it is very far-reach… but I wish I can reach it… anyway that shall be my goal… if really cant… I decided to venture into pharmacy or project & facilities management…. Hmm… I will further evaluate this when I go for the pharmacy course sometime in mid-dec… haha…
And thirdly… for some personal reason…

YAY PW IS OVER.... HAHAHAHA.....

2008-10-31T23:54:00.001+08:00

慢慢地，我抵着头，默默地离开了伤心地。周围的吵闹声似乎吵不到我宁静的心。这时个个都忙着对答案，算算自己是否能拿高分。但我并没参与，心里有数，知道自己再次失败。

2008-10-20T18:28:00.000+08:00

Yoyoyoyoyo…. I going crazy ler… anyway I had a great time yesterday… almost the whole day I was out… from about 10 to 12… at 1030, I was at NLB… I was there with my pw group… we were trying to find SOI for our WR… cause most of our SOI comes from the net… no variety lar… so we try to get some from books… anyway… lunch at Hans…. Ate chicken bacon carbonara… esther accompanied me… anyway after lunch went back to work about 1 hr then I chao liao…

Went to meet alwin at marina square… sian lar… I almost recover… but the sky isn’t good to me… it was raining super heavily… got no choice but to across and get drenched again… i guess I one week must drenched once lor… sian… anyway… went to marina square at last… since I seldom go out…. It is difficult for me to make my way to marina square GV… but then it is a great experience… very fun…so went to watch 20 century boys…. Erm the movie not bad lar… though plot a little dull… … after that… walk around in marina square awhile… then I went to bugis to meet my family…

after that… my family and I went to bottle tree village again… the food there so ex lor… don’t know why my bro want to go there… anyway after our very nice dinner… we went to play pool… got a young cute boy there too… he is our spectator… so funny lar… he say if we foal, must shoot two balls… my whole family don’t get what he meant lor… just laugh along… play pool for quite awhile…. Now my arms are hurting… my dad not bad at this game… so yesterday was one of the many lesson he gave us… sad… my dad left for Shenyang today…going to miss him… L…

Today… received two news… first… mrs oh say we will check our results tmr… the overall one… sian … I am quite nervous and afraid for myself… and also worry for my friends… hope most of the people can make it… good luck to all… second is erm supposedly good news…see how you take it lar… I am invited to go to the pharmacy course… one of my future job… when they ask for applicants… I was so eager to go… erm now… not really… cause I figure out I will be very busy….. but saying all that… I guess in the end I will still go lar… but like this my nov and dec will be so packed…

10th nov – op
11th nov to 27th nov – dance, cny’s mc & nov supplementary lesson
28th nov to 4th dec – Sydney trip
9th dec to 11th dec – dance camp
15th dec to 17th dec – pharmacy camp
That same week – holiday with family
Back form holiday till school reopen – cny’s mc…

Sian… going to be so busy… erm I kinda look for it though… sorry I am a little workaholic… as I said I am a crazy gal…

K anyway I got to go help my mom cook ler…

2008-10-17T23:21:00.001+08:00

This week have been very emo to me… Monday was the day when all J1s know how they fare for promo alone… though not very scary but still it can project fear on many people… for me… there is a certain level… anyway here are my results… not very promising…

GP – S
Chi – D
Maths (H2) – E
Chem (H2) – E
Bio (H2) – C
Econs (H1) – S

Erm I calculate my rank points…. It is 41… ask two of my seniors… both say sure can promote plus both congrats me… huh… but then I am thinking… my term 3 results all U leh… sian… don’t know lar… now I am living a life full of uncertainty… only till next week… then I can be truly relieved… sian… principal say got 4 groups…First – Congrats, you are promoted… Second – Erm you are there, so you have to take a re-exam… Third – Sorry, you are far off so you will be retaining… Forth – Sorry, you are far off and not able to retain…I am so afraid I will be in group 2… yea… haha… anyway had a bet with Samuel… he say I confirm promote if not he will treat me bubble tea plus plus plus… haha… though I do not like losing a bet… but I hope I do this time….

Oh yea… from now on… I decided to study real hard… erm though last minute work does work on me… tested it twice for olvl and promo… but it really drained my brain a lot… thus I still believe that consistent work is important… for now… I will concentrate on Chinese… planned to ace it… jia you me… haha… for pw… sian… till now Wr is not done… till now still got new ideas to put in… sian hope we can do it well… jia you my team… haha… for OP we will be the last… so not that bad… plus I have confidence with my group members oral skills… haha….

Today is J2 grad day… not sure why… but today just felt super emo… seeing them makes me remember of my sec 4 grad day… make me remember my secondary school days… k I am a very “nian jiu” girl… also… I am thinking… in years to come… I will face the same thing again… sitting as a class with CT talking to us…. Last day of cam-whoring…. Why must we farewell and say goodbye… sad… though I do not know lots of the J2s… I will miss them a lot… I will surely miss all my senior dancers… Good luck to all of u for your As… Endure for this final lap of your race in JC… jia you… :) …. Hope all of you can go into the course you want in uni…

I guess it is time for me to move on ler… living in fantasy is not a good idea… I should just forget it all and move on… since things ain’t possible… though I truly hope that there is something I can do… but then I realize… for now… I better give up… no point living in a world of fantasy… I just hope I can end it well… not like the previous… Hope so…

Time and tide waits for no one
Once opportunity is gone
It never comes back

So grab that chance
And cherish it well
Before it turn into regret
That will forever be in your heart

2008-10-12T15:06:00.000+08:00

Yox long time no blog… haha… down with my annual big flu… haha… sian cannot eat so much things… I miss my fried food… I miss my sweet chocolates… I miss the tender chicken… I miss all those junk food… hope I can recover soon…haha

After a long break… I finally had dance practice on Friday… haha… was quite sick but still I manage to dance… but sian not very well dance… did not have enough energy to dance too sian… haha… anyway still enjoy the lesson very much… cant wait for next week practice… haha….

Yesterday did a very interesting thing… haha… be garang guni for one day… haha… tiring but fun… me, Sandra and ellen one group…. Went to blk 708 to collect…. Haha… very early in the morning lor… it is like 8 am plus only… knock on the first few doors… no reply… I guess they are still sleeping bah… anyway we climb the stairs until the tenth floor… wah at that point of time… I was so impressed with the residents living there… cause I thought that they must climb ten floors everyday… haha.. but then when we get to the ninth floor… then I realize that the corridor can be linked to the lift at the centre of the block… haha… realized it ler then felt so stupid lor.. sian… oh well… but I can say that the layout is quite weird… and collection cannot really be done easily… haha… now I know why people want every floor to have lift… cause it is really inconvenient… anyway… waited for the truck so long… so ms tan let us get our bag from school first… haha…. when the truck came… we just throw the newspaper onto the truck… haha… the truck looks like collecting rubbish the lor… haha…

Thinking through these few days….Since things aren’t meant to be… I should not force it to happen anymore… I should just let things be the way it is now… it may be better… maybe things will change when times past… maybe it will not… but whatever it is… I should just let nature takes it course….

K here is a poem I wrote long time ago… thought it through decide to put it on display…

From Afar

From afar
I see you again
Afraid you notice
I hide myself

See you again
You make me smile
Afraid you saw it
I hide that smile

Make me smile
You are the only one
Afraid you realize
I hide the truth

The only one
Whom I love
Seeing you again
From afar

2008-10-05T15:11:00.001+08:00

Heyhey… just back from boon keng… went to bk’s mac again for pw… haha… once again it is a very short while… haha… discuss a little then I am back… haha…. sian… for this one month must strive hard for pw ler… jia you…

Haha… bought new earphones… omg it is so sound proof…haha… once plug in… I almost could block off any sounds…haha… not bad… bro recommend de… thanks bro…haha…

Yesterday I did two quite tough task… haha… marking my bro papers and decoding an interview… haha… it may seems easy but not for me… haha… first, regarding marking my bro paper…omg… I mark and almost all is cross… and this super upsets me…now I know how teachers feel marking our paper… and worst of all he made the same mistake I told him to correct it the last time… this is what really piss me off… really hope he can understand soon… next year PSLE ler… hope he will be able to make it… second, decoding an interview… haha… this is tough too… as I do not have huge vocab bank for English… I cannot understand what the professor is saying…haha… search all over dictionary and kept repeating… till now I am not done with it… sian….

Went to look at my friend’s blog… found out how close he is with his grandma…. Many of my friends have their grandparents by their side and they are close to them… For me, I was born with only two grandparents. At primary 4, I lost one. Now, I am left with one grandma who cannot remember who I am anymore. Whenever my friends talk about how close they are with their grandparents, I feel sad, lonely and sometimes a little jealous. Hmm, how is it like to have grandparents by your side? I wonder.

oh yea... from today... i going to sneek into the kitchen and learn some cooking skills from my mum... haha... hopefully i will be able to pick up something... haha... erm... trying to learn to be a gal that knows cooking... haha... so i may cook for my future husband next time mah... haha....

Here is two separate verse… haha

Like a star
You’re beautiful but far
Like sunrise
With moments, just for a while

Separated from young
Never close from the start
Wanting to change now
But nothing could be done

2008-10-01T22:13:00.000+08:00

Yox back again… haha… yesterday went to cut my hair… haha my fringe is shorter now… not very nice… haha… a little too short… haha…after visiting the saloon… went back to tidy up my study desk… haha… now much spacious ler… can study better… haha… normally when I touch dust… I will get flu but miraculously yesterday don’t have… haha…

Today… woke up at 9… went down to look for bro to play bball… but then cannot find them at the nearby court… jog all the way to near xinmin sec there… see if they are they… sad also not lor… then jog back… saw them near hougang point… we went to the near by jogging track to jog awhile then went back ler… haha… sian my stamina went down a lot…must train liao… next year 2.4 must do well… haha…

Haha… keyed in my primary schoolmates add into com today… haha… read a book which I gave my primary school mates to write cause we leaving ler… haha… this is what most gals do when young… haha… while reading it… I miss my pri sch mates a lot… always thought I do not have much friends in pri sch… but when read through I felt otherwise… haha…

2008-09-29T14:00:00.002+08:00

Find Yourself by Brad Paisley

When you find yourself
In some far off place
And it causes you to rethink some things
You start to sense that slowly
You're becoming someone else
And then you find yourself

When you make new friends in a brand new town
And you start to think about settlin' down
The things that would have been lost on you
Are now clear as a bell
And you find yourself
Yeah that's when you find yourself

Where you go through life
So sure of where you’re headin'
And you wind up lost and it's
The best thing that could have happened‘
Cause sometimes when you lose your way it's really just as well
Because you find yourself
Yeah that’s when you find yourself

When you meet the one
That you've been waitin' for
And she's everything that you want and more
You look at her and you finally start to live for some one else
And then you find yourself
That’s when you find yourself

When we go through life
So sure of where we're headin'
And we wind up lost and it's
The best thing that could have happened‘
Cause sometimes when you lose your way it's really just as well
Because you find yourself
Yeah that's when you find yourself

nice song about life... haha... hope you all enjoy...

2008-09-29T12:50:00.003+08:00

haha... yesterday was not bad... haha... watch f1 race... haha... it was the most exciting sport i ever watch... haha... while watching was dicussing about it to my friends on msn... haha... my whole family watch too... we were so noisy lor... kept commenting and commenting... like the race commentor... haha... but that is my family... love them lots....

haha... k felt very guilty... did not manage to study much... headache and stomach pain... don't know what wrong food i have eaten... sian lor... only study one chapter... oh well... today must chiong ler... before i rest and watch my 9pm show... final episode ler... wooooo.... haha...

oh yea... found the piano score for "love story"...haha... will try to master it... together with cannon in D... sian promise sam i will play cannon in D duet with him de... k must master it before he starts his a levels break... hope i can make it... jia you gal...

2008-09-27T22:58:00.000+08:00

Haha… today was quite great … packed up some stuff and get myself to have flu as usual… cause my nose is so afraid of dust… L… haha… the found out my bag was full of raisin…. Ahhh…. Sorry mrs oh… I did not eat your raisin and left it in my bag… now the ants feed on it… anyway wash my bag and hang it to dry lor… at last I started revising bio mcq… haha…

After a while… erm like 2 mins… my family and I went out to eat at AMK… haha… ate ramen and sushi… I realize the world is so small.. haha… saw a family that I have met in Cameron highlands while eating… so qiao… haha… after filling our stomach… we went arcade… played Daytona (dunnoe how to spell)…haha… sian lor… I was first for seven lap… but at the last curve… overtook by my bro… sian… haha… played many other games den went back ler… oh yea got my little toe hurt too.. knock onto something.. second time at the same spot this year ler lor.. oh well.. used to it…

Now back here typing my blog entry lor… later going to study bio ler… sian I miss the F1… and Hamilton did not win… sian… hope he will in tmr final… haha… going to watch final race on tv tmr… haha… hope no one will take up de tv ler… haha…

2008-09-26T22:45:00.004+08:00

2nd last paper done today so decided to blog…. Haha… anyway the last paper is just bio MCQ… but I am determined to score super well… hopefully full marks…

Anyway… a little update on what I have done these few weeks… erm… I was “studying” lor… haha… I cant say I did not study… I did but it was not effective… cause I cant seems to remember and do the exams… ahhh…. Anyway now the worst is maths test… after math test… I just felt like dying…. i do not know if I was stress out… but I was shivering while doing the test paper… I can say it was not due to the air con… cause while shivering, I was sweating as well… I feel warm… so why am I shivering… guess I was just stress out and because of this... many qus was not attempt…. Sianx…. Chem… did not mange to finish too… sian I know how to do but just no time… sian… doing chem… was like being chased by a bull… running like nobody business… rushing like mad…. Sian… Bio… wasted… what I memorise came out for essay… but because spent too much time on structured qus… wasted 20 marks juat like that... and yeah I actually forgot how to nucleus … ahhh… so now the best paper attempt is chi followed by gp then econs… hope these three papers can make my day when I received the results back…haha… haix… after every paper… I felt like all my energy is drained… a little dizzy… and super blur… I have never felt like this….
Now I really hope that I can pass promos… though things seem very bleak… but hope is all I can do now…

All along in my life, I tried not to make any enemies. However, in the process of trying, I had made one and it had affect my life ever since. It is “time”. Ever since primary five, time killed me. From then on, I started to burn midnight oil because I have difficulty to complete my work or either not enough time to study. During secondary 2, I had turn into owl sleep late like 11pm and wake up early (like 3am) for some certain reason. Now, in junior college, things became worse. My average daily sleep time is 4 hours. Please it is not even up to 6 hours.

Since secondary school, I have not completed my exam papers, especially for lit papers. The reason is simple. I lack of time management. Time become my greatest enemy. Ever since I knew it, I wanted to befriend with him but I can’t seems to. Till now, I am still trying. Hopefully I can befriend with time again.

change song to "Here without you"... haha... i think it is quite nice... the lyrics is very real...haha...

now for some pics....

Study time for fel..... Jia You...

leaf under moonlight.... haha....

2008-09-12T22:30:00.000+08:00

A week has passed… sianx not much revision has been done… haha…. but I have found out that studying in school is much better for me… at lest I get more things done… home is just too happening… get distracted easily…. For Monday and Tuesday…. I felt super tense up… “old friend” nearly come and visit me again…. Haha luckily never…. Thanks to my three good pals… Wednesday was a super happy day for me… was very crazy that day… haha… cause I found out one of my cousin going to get married soon… she and her bf has already went to ROM….haha… she is so pretty on that day… haha…. another couple live happily after again… haha… so happy…. But then sian…. Today… I received a bad news that my aunt went into the hospital… her illness has relapse… sian… I really wish she will get well soon… please let her be… she is one of my fav aunt and the only super cheerful aunt I have…. Please get well soon, da yi….. this week my life seems to be riding a roller coaster ride…haha… but isn’t this what is life about… haha….

This week …. Things somehow seems different in sr…. many many more students are study… like today morning…. Though we can come later to school… people are here earlier studying… really studying… heard from my senior… last year do not have that much j1 studying for promo like this… haha… and during lunchtime my pals and I hardly and find benches to study… when I sees this… it kinda stress me up… it kinda makes me guilty… cause I have not been studying much… sian… I cant be like this… must study… ahhh… let me have the endurance… jia you gal…. haha….

2008-09-12T22:06:00.002+08:00

Smile
Smile though your heart is aching
Smile even though its breaking
When there are clouds in the sky, youll get by
If you smile through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
Youll see the sun come shining through for you

Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
Thats the time you must keep on trying
Smile, whats the use of crying?
Youll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile

Thats the time you must keep on trying
Smile, whats the use of crying?
Youll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile

Here is a song… my gp teacher let me to hear de…. Not bad… k I delicate this song to all who are studying for EOY exams (alvls, promos and olvls)… jia you everyone… and whenever you feel like giving up…. Just smile and keep on trying…. And you will realize your goal is nearer… gambatte….

Haha… this song also speaks a lot about me… haha… sort of living this kind of life for the past few years…. Haha… though it may seems good… but somehow it may be not… haha…

2008-09-07T00:29:00.001+08:00

Haix…. Sian did not do much today… was supposed to finish studying one chap of bio but did not… super not efficient today… erm not only today but for the past two days….
Anyway did some pw today… finally done the email up for the interview… so late lar… this should be done so long ago….

Anyway….. I do not know why but I can’t seem to concentrate on studying these days…. Mind kept wondering off…. Thinking of something else which is not that important as compared to study lar… how I wish there is some pill that I can take to let me focus… to give me the endurance to run finish the last lap of the race for this year…. I wish there is something that could make me forget all my worries and other things expect for study… I hope that I will stop staring at blank walls or out of my window again… But instead spent this precious time on my books… I really wish….

Guess I will not be blogging much after today ler…. Should concentrate on promos cya…

2008-09-04T20:12:00.002+08:00

Erm if anyone saw the previous post please ignore it… sorry if that have offended anyone…. Anyway this is my second time blog this week… haha… life is still as usual…. Super busy… sian promos is near but I cant seem to concentrate… gal must jia you…. Haha really wish I have the concentration soon….

Recently…. I think my patience has somewhat went very low…. there is certain things that I cannot tolerate any longer… I have did that for the past few months but I am really afraid one day I will not be able to handle the suppressed temper in me… and that I will just flare up…. Hmmm… if I am not wrong… it had been three years since I last flare up.... I really hope this time round I can make it through the end and not get angry… but my patience is really running low…. Hmmm…. My friends say that I have tons and tons of patience… yea maybe I do have…. But even so it will naturally run out… I really wish there is some device to help me top up my patience level….haha… keep cool gal…. :).....

2008-09-02T21:14:00.003+08:00

Heyo…. Back at home after my piano exam today… haha…. erm piano exam did not go well though I got a very kind examiner…. Anyway sort of expected the results… but did not expect that worse…. Sian was so nervous till I super blur… haha… oh well… erm maybe going to take my third grade 8 piano exam in 2010…. Till then I have to jia you in promo and for next year, alvls…. Haha…. anyway… thanks to all my friends wishes me luck for this piano exam… thanks u all... Really glad to know many friends supporting me….

Haha…. I feel that I am super fortunate…. To have so many friends and people around me who really cares for me… I really thanks all my friends who are always there for me… thanks u all… because of all your support…. Life does not seems so tough…. Thanks…. I am really grateful to have a bunch of really good friends…. Esp thanks to Vanessa, gwen, heda, jk, sam and meiyi….. thanks u all…. I hope that I have been a great friend to all of you too…

Forget the past
And worry less
Let time turn back
To where it start

Let the heart unwind
To free the soul
Hoping the best
For what future holds

Letting it go
One by one
Though not much
But still it’s done

Unlocking my heart
To take you away
Forgetting the past
To start all over again

Haha… back to my sec sch days.… haha….. (cant see me in pic though)

2008-08-30T15:50:00.001+08:00

It is the start of sep holiday… haha… but for students… it is just holiday-in-name… haha…. Anyway yesterday was teacher’s day…. This year, the concert did not seems so good yea… erm my dance team one was quite ok…. Sian I made mistake here and there… then late was my solo dance with Christopher playing the guitar and Siara singing… I was super embarrassed lar… did not dance good at all lor…. Though many of my friends say it was ok…. Thanks for the complement gals… though to me it was not good at all… erm maybe I had a high expectation for myself bah… like I always do… haha….

Anyway after all these I went to meet sec sch friends… went there late so waited outside the mrt station for them… haha…. erm saw sherry, pm, huiying, pris, careen, cass, zoey, wan zhen, cinny, xinyi, val, clement, ian, johnathan, kai wai and jk… haha… went to orchard and eat at fish and co. haha… my first time at fish and co. haha… erm not a good experience… very very luan and slow service… haha… anyway eat and talk a lot… then took some pics… and then we went separate ways… my and my friends went to window-shop at ps… but I was so tired I just kept yawning… sian… haha… not long ago just came ps… I think I went ps quite often tis year… haha… anyway for a while I went back ler…

Then went to yishun for piano testing… the place so ulu lor… then went to amk hub watch “money not enough 2”… hilarious cum touching… I cried at the end part… it is a very nice movie… haha… should go watch….haha… after the movie… I found out I lost my hp… super scared I went back cinema to check… luckily it was there… then when in taxi … I thought I lost my wallet… check my bag again I cant find… then my old illness was back again…. Because of that my bro and mum quarreled… so sorry bro made u scolded by mum…. But luckily my mum found my wallet in the end… thanks mum...

Sian I think I will not tell u my illness and explain to you anymore… cause I know you will not be able to fully understand this illness of mine… for many years, I know you care but you do not show it directly by encouragement which I really needed… and most importantly now… I am afraid if i tell you anything... i will expect something from you... so it will be better if i do not tell and thus, expecting anything.... I do not blame you for anything… I do not want you to change just to suit me... I just do not wish anymore people, especially someone I truly care and love to worry about me anymore… sorry and I hope you will understand… so sorry....

2008-08-24T20:42:00.003+08:00

Sometimes love just ain't enough

I don't wanna lose you,I don't wanna use you
just to have sombody by my side
And I don't wanna hate you
I don't wanna take you
But I don't wanna be the one to cry
That don't really matter to anyone, anymore
But like a fool I keep losing my place
And I keep seeing you walk through that door

But there's a danger in loving somebody too much
And its sad when you know it's your heart you can't trust
There's a reason why people don't stay where they are
Baby sometimes love just ain't enough

Now I could never change you
I don't wanna blame you
Baby you don't have to take the fall
Yes I may have hurt you
But I did not desert you
Maybe I just want to have it all
It makes a sound like thunder
It makes me feel like rain
And like a fool who will never see the truth
I keep thinking something's gonna change

But there's a danger in loving somebody too much
And its sad when you know it's your heart you can't trust
There's a reason why people don't stay where they are
Baby sometimes love just ain't enough

And there's no way home
when it's late at night and you're all alone
Are there things that you wanted to say
Do you feel me beside you in your bed
there beside you where I used to lay

And there's a Danger in Loving somebody too much
And it's sad when you know it's your heart they can't touch
There's a reason why people don't stay who they are
Cause baby sometimes love just ain't enough
Baby sometimes love just ain't enough

added a song... hope u will enjoy it...

2008-08-24T13:14:00.005+08:00

haha bu zhi bu jue.... this is my 100th post.... congrats to me... Haha… k before I start on my work… I blog for a while… haha…. This week is a crazy week for me… my mood goes high and low…

haha… Monday and Tuesday super busy… tests and mock spa… haha…. But luckily I pulled through it… haha… on Monday… I had dance too… haha… so fun…. Erm but that day I did not practice much… sian…. Tuesday is pakced with three tests… clearing one after one makes me feels lighter… haha…. Wednesday… nothing much just dance and haha… finally saw mr dan… talk about his personal life for a while then back to practice for teachers’ day….

Thursday… stay back to complete vectors 2… haha… erm but I was talking crap with joel most of the time… use about 1 hr to do one part of one qus….haha… I am so efficient… haha… then while doing work something not good happen… I was hyperventilating again… I did not really know it was hyperventilation until heda told me… I am so glad that heda was there… If not I think my condition will be worse… thanks gal… love you so much… that day I was in that state for about 3 hrs… after I ate vitamin B… I felt better… this condition is a psychology effect… haha…. Guess had been stress up for the past few days… anyway… I guess I had to stay calm and happy all day long… haha…

Haha yesterday was super funny… my family and I did something very very silly and fun… haha… we ask my youngest bro to piggy back all of us… including my dad and mum… then we took a pic… haha… super siao lar…. I was rolling on the floor laughing… haha…. No joke… haha… today stomach still hurt may be because of ytd laughter I guess… haha…..

K I am off to work… jia you everyone…. some pics ... :)....

haha part of s9.... cam whoring.... haha....

crazy gals posed....haha....

us again but with will run shirt.... haha

me and my two darlings... haha...

2008-08-16T23:02:00.001+08:00

Haha… decided to change url…. Cause of some people… oh well… I thought of changing blog skin too… but guess will do that after promos…

Yesterday an interesting thing happens to me…. Haha the bus I took home broke down…. I think it is cool… wierd gal.... because I first time experience… always took dad’s car home de…. When the bus first jerk… everyone wondered what happen... look here and there… then bus driver try his super best to drive to the next bus stop… haha… after the bus stop I decided to walk home from there…. Haha…. What a great walk…. Quite a distance covered…

Dance was great this week… going to perform some comtemp plus hip hop dance on teachers’ day… haha…. Though I did not choreograph but I know it was really tough… thanks to all the dancers who choreograph… the dance was great…. Haha… but I had to practice real hard… some steps is not good at all… jia you gal….

Hmm… nothing much this week that’s all… sian nearer and nearer to piano and promo ler…

Anyway here is three para of words…haha

Thinking

Thinking of the past
I regret now
Should have nodded then
And not frown today

Thinking of the present
Happy about the past
Glad that I said ‘NO’
If not I will be hurting now

Thinking of the future
Fears history repeats itself
With so many thoughts
Blur my mind
Should just stop thinking at all

2008-08-09T22:07:00.004+08:00

Hi… Happy National Day…. Whoo… Singapore is 43 years old ler….haha… did not went anywhere to celebrate… just stay at home to eat many food given from my neighbour…. Thanks them a lot…. Anyway watch the performance… erm… this year very short performance leh… but it was nice and meaningful lar… haha… sian tot can watch the fireworks from my house…. In the end cant… only see smoke….haha… thres a lot of fireworks display this year… haha so shoik…..

Haha… yesterday did not need to go sch early… so went to ps to watch movie with heda, gwen, tricia, Cheryl and keng yang… haha… actually wanted to watch dark knight… but cant… the show start very late… sian… so we went to watch mummy… haha… the show was great… quite thrilling…haha… one of us was scared by the sudden appearance of the yeti… and she screams…hehe… oh yea… theres one part where there is a few kids kept laughing and it is so annoying… the whole theatre kept sushing them… bu they still wont stop then one shouted shut up…haha…. Though irritating I was laughing….haha…
Later went back to school…. For thanks giving and national day parade…

Thanks giving concert was awesome… had not seen any better teachers’ performance than that… the students’ energy level was high throughout… it seems like real concert… with people singing along and many shouts for encore… so shiok…. Haha… love sr teachers…. After the concert, did a giantgantic choo cho train…haha j1s from different class… it was so great… saw mass tao pok also… my class guys join in… but they do not even know the victim… haha…. That night I realized my class love to take pic… took lots and lots of them… will upload bits by bits…haha….

Oh yea got my piano exam date ler… sian… 2nd sep… I am do dead… when I receive the news… I was numb… felt nothing… I thought it will wake me up…. But some how I have given up hope… sian… will anyone enlighten this lost soul…. I want to do well… but my mind hate to face the stress… because of stress I fall ill already… plus kena slight hyperventilation… I do not wish my stress level to go up even further… what am I going to do?....

heres some of the pics...

1S9 gals rocks.... haha love them lots.... (omg i look so act cute... sianz....)
haha.. heda and me outside best... hehe... (looks like i am hugging heda :)...)
us again with jj the jet plane....
me, gwen, cheryl and tricia.... haha.... with the batman mobile... cant watch then take phtot lor.... zzzz....

2008-08-04T03:14:00.003+08:00

yox.... after a week... i am back to blog... haha... last sat was a bg day for all srjcians... we had our charity run... will run...haha...

for will run... i ran 12 km in 1hr 45 mins... sian i could actually run more... but due to my gastric pain.... i cannot... sian... i found out it is super easy to complete 1o km in that duration... haha.... anyway... after the run... went to change into my will run shirt... haha... my class the cip sales.... then went off to cheers for all the guys in their run.... i realised guys in sr run pretty fast and had loads of determination too... way a go guys... haha.... at the closing ceromony... dancers did their hip hop... it was so great... love them loads.... haha.... after the will run... my class is back to shirt business... haha.... this time it was much more organised... haha... sitting at the booth i saw many students and teachers wear our will run shirt... haha with that sight... i had a great sense of satisfaction... seeing people love our shirt... haha... anyway had our distribution... plus many many photo shots... haha... will upload them when i get it... but guess it will be long... haha....

last friday... i went for early to see doc... he say all my prob was due to stress yea... i guess so... thats why i always do not want to go see a doctor... i knew why i was sick... but only that i cannot sure it permanantly... how to relieve stress in a always stressful environment... i really wish i will find that sure quickly... cause i do not know how long my body can tahan... meanwhile all i can do is to try my best to sleep well... yea...

i am very sad because of you... you knew i was sick because of stress... but your reaction did not show it at all... when i am sick... you will not let me to rest... you will always scold me if i do that... yea... i know that i have stuff to complete and if i sleep i will not be able to complete... but even i continue.... it will be very tough for me.... sometimes i really do not want to tell you that i am sick... that i am in great stress.... so that i can lie to myself that you did not care cause i did not tell... however, i really wish i will not do that... cause part of me really want to share every thing with you... but looks like things will not turn out right if i do so... but will it be if i do not... i really do not know... so i just wish you will show the care... i am really very tired already...

k heres some long time pics... haha....

christina, lilian and me at dance farewell party....

haha isnt lilian pretty...haa...
joanna, dwayne, christina, robelle and me....

ahh miss robelle and joanna so much....
mr dan and dancers after watching the dance fest...

haha still rmb mr dan ask us to write essay on this perfomance...hehe...
the three beauties... haha... my best pals... love you loads....
haha... amelia and me...

haha... tv shows rocks... haha....

2008-07-28T04:30:00.005+08:00

long tym no blog.... seriously do not have the time to.... anyway last week was super hectic.... have two cip project going on... one is selling of shoes in dance and another is the selling of shirt for class... i remember on thursday i was doing two sales.... my friends were all so ke lian.... anyway for the cip project...i found out that the j2 support more.... maybe because it is their last year here... really thanks them alot...

yesterday.... my pw group came to my house to of cause do pw.... haha.... two came only... the rest have church service to attend... after pwing .... went to eat at punggol there.... then came back.... i went to bed and now here i am typing.... haha....

oh yea.... yesterday i found out i was mild flat footed.... for so long, i have been wondering why my foot ache so much... now i know the reason..... sian.... i ask my friend is there a cure for it.... he say go see doc lor.... and no other choice.... i super lazy lar... plus i dun feel like wasting my parents $.... actually besides this i have many health prob that need to consult a doctor... but same i do not want to go... i am crazy gal... i know... maybe i grew up in an environment where seeing doctor is an abnormal thing... yea.... now i just hope my run on sat will not be that hurtful....

k here some pics.... randomly pick one.....

haha.... remembering the past.... this is me and pm while mugging for olvl....

haha.... this is my shoes... done by my mum.... thanks.... love it.....
haha.... my class cip project.... i will run shirt.... srjcians must buy hor....
this is the back.... cool!!!!
k end off with a beautiful sun setting pic.... took in sch....

2008-07-19T23:55:00.001+08:00

Hix…. Back in action again….. sian this week is super stressed up… almost everyday I need to do something to relieve stress…

k… this week pe was quite fun… had my first pe game module… I was posted to play Frisbee… haha… actually put first choice as soft ball de… however… I think I did not sign up my third choice…. Thus, they randomly put me in frisbee… anyway… never mind lar… though was a little disappointed… haha…. While playing Frisbee…. Soft ball area was just beside… so I had one phrase to describe “so near yet so far”…. Haha… anyway had fun in Frisbee…. Did some drill and then played the actual game…. Was playing sort of attacker in the first part of the game…. Later I was too tired to run plus no one was at the goal post… I went to be the goali… guess what…. I help my team to score the only point… haha… k lar… the other team was very pro… they have good goali….

Thursday pe was good… supposed to do my 5km run test… But when my face change colour…. Mr goh ask me to stop… haha… actually I was not suppose to run cause I had flu… but really I do not mind running… anyway run about 7rounds then stop…. Later on and off run to support my friends…. Ahhh… I need to train sia…. I want to be in the will run… not the will walk… cause walk to me, no kick…. Sian…. Sorry I love challenges…

Oh yea… been stress up by piano and school work… I cried in front of my friends… How I wish I will not do that… How I wish my tears will not flow at that time… but I really cannot control…. I never felt so stress up before… never felt so helpless before… I do not wish my friends to worry about me…. Sorry pals…. And thanks you all so much for encouraging me and help me… you all are very great friends… thanks….

2008-07-10T14:10:00.003+08:00

yox.... blogging again after a super long time... haha...now i am bloggin from school... first time try sia... haha.... anyway just last weekend... i went to cameron highlands....haha.... another first time... first tiome going on holiday during weekends....

Day 1

- swimming in a super cold pool...
- went to flower nursery, strawberry farm, veg farm... haha... shiok...
- steamboat dinner
- tai di game....

Day 2

- wake up at 5.30
- watch sunrise
- saw tea plantation
- "car accident"
- breakfast
- 2nd viewing tea plantation
- fetch david
- trekking
- break
- top view
- tea factory
- seeing of village
- lunch
- sleep
-dinner
- Kboxing
- pool game plus lesson
- Good nite

Day 3
-breakfast
- pool game
- back to sing

several incident happened on this trip... "car accident"... haha.... no one got hurt but van got stuck....haha.... because of some funny reasons.... but shall not say it out here.... anyway.... one of the back wheel for the van is free-wheeling thus the back tires cannot move.... which mean the van cannnot move.... haha.... everyone came down.... and now my hero dad is to the rescue.... haha.... being one of the three male adults in the van....plus a mechanic.... he analyse the prob and taught us why the van cant move.... then gave the solution of taking stones to made some sort of ground so that the tire is not free-wheeling.... so his reserchers (the three child in heng family) went to collect stone..... the other male adults help too.... soon we are out of the sticky situation.... haha... cool.... dad rocks..... haha...

anyway love this tour alot.... we had personal van for most of the time.... and sat jeep and mercs for the first time.... haha.... oh yea.... this tour agent is a great.... they are very friendly.... their service is great plus the tour package is not very ex....haha.... i had fun....

ok.... back to reality.... received my MYE rank points.... 31 points.... sian.... although it is more than some of my classmates.... this score to me is still low.... and i know it is only me to blame.... blame myself for not studying... blame myself for not able to pay attention in lectures.... blame myself for not focusing.... sian.... anyway i had form a study group but i cant stay everyday to study.... sorry gals.... sian.... this time i failed econs and gp.... now i think i should have taken H1 lit.... at least i cant still crap and get better marks than econs.... now for econs... i cant do case study.... i dont do geography in secondary school... why i took econs.... anyway it is too late to say anything about subject combination ler.... thus all i can do now is to ask when in doubt and get as many help as i can.... SO ANYONE CAN HELP ME IN ECONS.....

for gp.... this mye i screwed it up.... read the qus wrongly.... interpret wrongly.... thus write wrongly.... sian.... vannessa did the music one... and score not bad.... sian i should have do that too... oh well... too late to reverse anything.... now all i can do is to do more essay and i hopefully wish mr ng can help me to mark.... however i do not wish to add workload to teacher.... dont know lar.... sian....

Music... Piano.... sian somehow i begin to detest it.... really wish to give up.... but i jolly well know it is impossible.... i have started on this journey... there is no turning back.... so all i have to do is to practise even harder.... but how to do so if the passion is gone.... Music is something that needed strong passion to learn.... especially in higher grade.... i am really super lost now....

lately.... mind had been thinking.... went to cameron highlands and thought through many things.... i decided not to think about it anymore.... not to analyse the situation anymore... just let nature take its course.... currently my first proities is study... nothing can take over it... not even my all-time favourite dance.... 9 more weeks to promo no slacking....

Time check
9 weeks to promo
7 weeks to spa
2 months to piano exam

2008-06-27T00:40:00.002+08:00

Yo Ho Ho... back from exams.. hahah... okie exams is a total screwed.... i never felt so failure before.... Monday.... i had gp and econs.... gp was quite okie... kinda luckily... the only topic i study i know how to do... however, i am not sure if it is ap or da... oh well... econs... a killer paper for me.... hahaha.... i confirm get U ler... cause i did not do a hell ton of qus... haha... Tuesday it is chinese and maths paper... okie chinese was quite easy... but i kept sleepin as usual... i really do not know why chinese paper make me sleepy... haha... maths another dead paper....haha... why did i take H2 maths so tough... i cant finish the paper lor... worst paper i ever did.... Thursday was the both sciences paper... siao wan lor.... two H2 science paper in one day... how to study....anyway i focus my studying on chem but then i think i fare better for bio than chem... at lest i complete more qus in bio.... omg... my chem really horrible....anyway exams over liao... next up Alvl chinese oral.... i need my distinction... hope i can get it...

haha.... yesterday was the celebration of my new niece wan ting meimei at pasir park's bungalow.... haha... another baby to care....haha carried her yesterday... haha she so cute... but quite heavy.... oh yea... my bro seems to have a magical touch.... he carry her den hum a christmas song and she slept.... i was like wth i cant do that... oh well.... haha... that night was another babysitting night...haha... created little games for my super bored beloved kai kai and his mei mei.... haha... play until i sweat lor.... chase them like siao.... they like got endless energy de.... haha can train my stamina.... sian actually i thought my cousin will be there but all were busy... so long never meet them ler... miss them so much lor... so many things to catch up... haha...

oh yea been slacking for like three days... haha... haven do chem hw yet... siao wan lor... they gave us tutorial ti di after the exam... haha... anyway 1S09 has new chem, maths and civil teacher... haha... Mrs kenoh is our chem and civil teaher...haha... k got to go do hw and practise my oral ler...

2008-06-22T14:33:00.005+08:00

yoxx... here to blog a little... haha bascially today post will be past pics... haha... anyway this week had been studying... and it is killing me... ahhhh... i will be dead for mid yrs... anyway decided to do my best for mid yrs... and after MYE... i will work super hard and everyday... sian recently just settled my own emotions prob thus hardly study... sian but oh well will do to my very best in the next test and of cause for promo....back is aching like siao... i think is because of the recent cough i had... sianzzz..... k heres the pic.... musical wan

haha... robelle, mei yi, christina and me with make up... ahhh miss robelle alot...

haha... dancers with rose from Mr Dan.... took after the last perfromance....

Mr willy and some of the dancers.... miss hip hop so much....

now dance picnic photos... haha...

haha... me, vivian, sandra and ameila... :) gals...

haha... peek-a-boo... haha...

vivian ameila and me under the tree...haha

sitting on a log.... haha....

me by the pond... hope i dun fall down....

k thats end of photo session... haha will have more after exams... hehe....

2008-06-17T10:33:00.000+08:00

haha... just back from dental appointment... it has been 3 years since i visited a dentist... haha... anyway dental appointment was quick... one of my big tooth has a big hole so need to do some fillings... haha... erm it was quick but kinda pain... bleed quite alot... the dentist ask me to bite some soft tissue thingy to clean the blood... when he took out the whole tissue was filled with blood lor... haha... anyway just happy its over... sian cant eat tough meat for one day....

oh yea... my family celebrated father's day with dilys' family on sunday... haha... went to saf yatch club to eat and then karoking down there too... haha... that day i was super sick... cant finish the "minty" lamb chop i ordered... did not have appetitie plus it is so oily... haha... anyway keep sneezing.... don't know how many tissue i use ler lor... haha...

after the great dinner... we went to chang K... haha... K time was awesome... the whole lounge was just only us... haha.... so cool lor.... a great situation cause this two family can go high and craze liao... haha... anyway i found a spot under the light so i feel warm under the super cold aircon... haha... that time the karoke was randomly playing song.... just as i settled down... i heard that song... and memories back in my mind... my mum handed me the mic ask me to sing... somehow i could not sing instead i went emo and tears was in my eyes.... after that song i went outside to take a breeze... stablise my feelings then wentback in again... haha... this time my bro requested a happy song to sing...haha... anyway time spent was super fun... though i was sick but i went siao tooo... accompany my dad and bro on singing without mic.... haha actually it is shouting .... haha... oh yea my bro and i wanted to sing "superwoman" haha but half of the time we don't know how to sing... haha.... kept laughing throughout... i played pool with bro too but i lose lar... no skills of cos lose mah... haha... oh yea my bros and i presented the present to our #1 dad too... haha... it is a watch.... hope he like it...

yesterday i receive a bad news from cass... one of zhss history teacher had passed away on sunday.... he had liver infection and was suppose to take treatment but postponed it due to mid yrs.... i felt so sad after receiving the news... though he had never taught me before but he was a good teacher as my friends had said so.... he may be fierce sometimes but he meant well... rest in peace , mr tan....

life is so fragile... thinking of this i wondered about my past thoughts on life.... when i was very young, i actually thought of commiting suicide.... then whenever i felt lost in life.... i would stress myself up by running and running and not stop even when i was breathless,knowing i would si kong anytime.... thats how stupid i was in the past... maybe because i was a child then... anyway death is something no one can avoid.... so one must cherish their life more... living it meaningfully .... i am now trying real hard to do so... oping i will accomplish it asap... and sustain it...

recently something amusing is happening... haha... there is a black cat living near the carpark where my house is.... i don't know if i was the one that is special or the black cat is special... cause it will only mew at me... erm when dad and me walked past it.... it did not mew at my dad but me.... then the other time was with my bro and mum... the cat also responded in the same way.... haha.... people say a black cat meant unlucky... so does that mean i will unlucky too... haha... k i shall not be supertitious.... haha....

oh yea... started on revision yesterday... it is like finally... haha... anyway... i found out that i don't know how to do maths... haa.... so stress.... past few days... i felt that there is like a pile of "knowledge" in front of me.... i dun know where and how to begin to digest it all... and keep it in my mind... so lost.....i really hope i can do well ofr mids yrs...

k anyway got to go study again ler cya....

2008-06-11T17:01:00.000+08:00

haha... heyhey... blogging again....oh yea first thing.... HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZHI XIAN... bian lao ler....haha.... anyway wish you all the best and everything will move on smoothly for you oh yea and really really stay happy always k.... haha...

anyway i went to the dance pinic today..(erm actually fact yesterday...cause over 12 ler mah... sorry for lameness)... haha... i have fun today though very little J1 went... haha...sian mei yi got tuition... so i join sandra, amelia and vivian... thanks gals for welcoming me... haha...erm we went off early....haha... we wanted to go out of botanic gardens and go to orhard for shopping... haha but guess what.. we took ages to do so.. cause kept stopping to take pics... but cant resist lor... the scenery so nice... haha... oh yea saw one wedding couple there too... haha then all of us say wedding must come here take pics too...haha...after a long walk.. we are finally out of the botanic gardens... however when we get to orchard... amelia and me had to go off first ler... so part with snadra and vivian... we went back... yea... dats my dance pinic yesterday... haa... oh yea bought back lots of presents... mosquitoes bites....

hahaha... oh yea read back my previous post i realised i want to change one ans to the qus...

#5. What's your ideal lover like ?
my ans: someone who is complementary to me... just like jig-saw puzzle bits that will piece up with my bits to form a beautiful picture... and also must be someone who loves and cares for me dearly and vice verse...haha....

ahhh i must really start studying soon... exams coming ler.. sian but no motivation to study lor... mind kept wondering off..... sian....haha... i cant wait for tmr combine dance lesson with HCI and NJ... erm but i still do not know how to get there... hope i dont get lost... hehe.... anyway got to go study liao... (hope so)... cya....

2008-06-08T00:14:00.000+08:00

yox back to blogging again... k first must do the tag that vannessa told me to do...

Tagged by vannessa / van
here goes...

Rules of the Taggy Quiz:
A] People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs & replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.
B] Tag 8 people to do this quiz & those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by & cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by.
Continue this game by sending it to other people.

Here are my answers:
#1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be ?
i will be hurt and very sad lor,,, but i doubt i will cry cause too hurt liao...then later i will think why he did this to me lor...is it my fault?... haha...

#2. If you can have a dream come true, what would it be ?
to live in a peaceful environment...(wish can never come true...) more realistic, i wish my friends and family will be happy... (simple and childlike hor...)

#3. What will your dream wedding be like ?
somewhere that has nice scenery preferably with sunset...haha... soothing background music... and at night there is plenty of stars to gaze upon... but most importantly is still having the best person that will spend that day of life and forever with me... haha...

#5. What's your ideal lover like ?
erm...caring.. able to make me happy....need not be very handsome... have a heart for others... friendly... erm can cook...haha...cos i don't really know how to cook... but i will learn k... hehe... but most important must love me dearly...hahaha.....

#6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
of cause, being loved... but having the feel of loving someone is not bad too lar... haha...

#7. How long do you intend to wait for someone u really love ?
as long as he give me a reply... yea...

#8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do ?
Wish and hope that they will stay happy always ... and i most probably will stay away from that person so as to forget him... yea...

#9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days ?
the fact that i had to make many decisions... and most of the decision is not what i really want... but i know only if i choose that it will benefit me... so no choice...

#10.What do you want most in life ?
to live it meaningfully and live it to the fullest...

#11. What is your all-time favourite song?
"love me" by collin raye... "Canon in D".... and many other classical song and English oldies... yea...

#12. How do you see yourself in ten years time ?
probably working somewhere in the Singapore market... haha... i hope to get a post of a manager in a big company... yea...haha...

#13. Who is the current most important person to you ?
people whom i care... basically my family and friends....

#14. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is ?
haha... she is fun to be with... caring friend... my dear music pal... someone who you can talk and share to... quite a smart gal too... haha... love her lots...

#15. Would you rather be single & rich or married but poor ?
erm single and rich bah... actually i dun really mind... if fate want me to be that, den that lor...haha...

#16. If you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be ?
puppy... i think they are very cute... haha....

#17. What are one of those things which you would prefer not to do ?
i will prefer if i do not think so much... yea... it cause me great emo times.. haha... and also not to be so soft-hearted...

#18. What kind of person do u think u are ?
erm... friendly... organised... low self-esteem... deep-thinker...haha....

#19. What do you define as a bad day ?
bad day?... erm... get scolding from mum lor.. or hear scolding from mum...though it may not be to me...

#20. If you have to choose between love (as in boy-girl relationships) and friendship, what would it be ?
friendship... they last longer...haha... as a Chinese saying goes... zai jia kao fu mu... zai wai kao peng you... yea...

My next 8 targets are: erm ivan my bro… u must do hor…. anyone who read my blog... yea...since very little ppl read my blog hehe...

k now for my weekly post...

haha.. today went to watch "Kung Fu Panda".. which i not suppose too... since MYE is like two weeks later... haha... anyway... that show is not bad... very funny but it is all quite lame de lar.. but those who want to watch comedy... it is a great movie... erm quite insprationl too.. but must understand the deeper meaning lar... haha... anyway... saw wen xuan over at AMK hub… haha she and her schoolmates setting up booth and selling something… heng she did not see me… haha….but after the movie I went to say hi lar.. erm cant be so unfriendly mah… hehe…

oh yea I got back my grade 8 theory results ler… hehe I passed … haha… so happy… so now only left with the practical to overcome… hope I am able to do so… erm I can make it… haha….

I have made up my mind ler… and it is to quit… this whole week I had been weighing pros and cons and I realized it is still better to quit… hope my decision will be correct… hope by doing so I will have more time to focused on other things… making them as perfect as possible… haix… making this decision is tough… I will miss all those times I spent there and with many friends there… the only performance I had… about 11 years of memories… I will never forget it… hard to let it go but I know I have to… thanks for all the memories, teaching, jokes and life lessons I have there… thanks all…

Erm that should be about all ler lar… very long post today ler.. haha… cya nxt tym…

2008-05-30T05:50:00.000+08:00

Yo….lately, I have been late on updating blog…. Erm anyway last week nothing much happen…. Just went through even deeper thought and finally come up with the decision… now currently trying to accept the fact and adapt to it…

Haha…quite happy last week… dance is back in action… haha… training starts last week…. It is quite tough but no doubt it is fun… haha… k I am suppose to write down my goals in down… here it goes….

Flexibility- all kinds of split... lower back bend…
Jumps – double arabesques jumps… spilt jumps…
Turns – Double turns from any position and types of turns (die die must learn how)… diagonal turns (must perfect diagonal)…

K like this for now… will add more next time …. Haha can’t think of much now…

Oh yea… this wed I went to TRCC again…. Went there to watch the dance fest… haha… anyway met the dancers in causeway point first…. Haha they bought cake from breadtalk for angela… HAPPY BELATED 17th BIRTHDAY, ANGELA…. Haha …. Wish all your dreams come true… haha… angela looks like ming xin on that day…haha…. Anyway I did not join in the celebration… cause I went to meet alwin… haha thanks for coming…haha… met up with him… then went window shopping and aimlessly walking in the mall… finally settled in KFC for dinner… haha chose a bad spot… cold like siao… anyway we cant choose lar… no more space ler mah… after dinner… went for somemore aimlessly walking… later walked to rp…

haha… the dances… it was awesome… hip hop was full of power… comtemp and classical were full of nice tactics displayed… salsa dance was full of jazz… mr dan’s works were so meaningful… hahah…. Mr dan dance so well… love his back bend a lot…. Ahhh when can I ever reach even half of his standard….

After the dance, alwin went off first… haha… I felt kinda bad… cos sort of bored him during the trip… yea sorry… later took many many pics with dancers and mr dan… haha… all wear so nice must take pics mah… hehe…. Then… bits by bits, the dancers left…

Kinda down recently… haix… I am not sure where to begin… it is just that found out many things recently plus already existed problems… hope everything will be ok… hope I will have the mood for studying or even living a life clearly… currently I am living my life aimlessly…

Anyway recently come out with some short poem… erm it does not seems like a poem anyway… just some phrases bah…

Life & Death
From the day I was born
I know I am going to die
The only difference is whether
Sooner or later

As time goes by
As I grew older
Pondering on this same old question
My days became shorter

Believe or trust
To believe
Or not to trust
To trust
Or not to believe

With mind like a stone
Makes me hard to see you
With heart like a Martian
Makes it difficult to understand you

Tree
A tree
With many branches
Trying to reach out to the sky

Some succeed
And bear sweet fruit
But some fail
Only to serve as a shelter for man below

Road
Like a road
With many routes
All leading to many different places

Right, Left or Straight
Direction needed to be made
That’s why roads need traffic lights

Stop and think which way to go
Settle down before time goes
Just move on and make it good
To the destination, here we go

2008-05-21T04:14:00.000+08:00

yox... for last week, nothing much happen... it is just a week of tears and scoldings... loud quarrels between my mum and bro... which affect me alot.... scoldings from piano teacher.... people miunderstood my friend because of me.... sad....sad....sad... anyway i hope that this week will be much better....

haha... anyway i spent this year vesek day in different way... haha... normaly stayed at home but this year differs.... early in the morning meet up with zhi xian to go visit one of my senior at NUH... sian lor on the way there and back ... i kena shaun like siao... but i know he joking de lar... haha... oh yea i did not know i have arm muscle lor.... haha.... sian .... anyway when at NUH... we gave him the macmuffin that zhixian bought... haha... oh yea i sort of broke the hashbrown in two... but it was on purpose k.... zhixian kept claiming that i did it on purpose... haha.... looking at my senior so weak .... though i don't know him much... somehow i feel sad and helpless too... i want to help but i don't know how to.... i really wished that he will be given the fighting spirit to fight through this tough battle... besides him.... i saw other paitients in the same ward too... one of them is also a youngster.... why must youngster face such a tough battle.... haix.... i guess when something wants to fall on you.. you have no choice but to accept it and fight on.... anyway... after visiting him... i had to rush off for pw....

sian lor... pw.... we kena chased out so many time... went to mac.... they say no studying.... then went to KFC... there is no power coming out from the powerpoint.... so went to cc.... who knows it is closed on vesek day... then we went back to mac... so some paper work.... then went to bowling alley to type.... haha.... so noisy lor... oh yea... so sorry pw group... i cant contribute much.... i am so sorry... anyway i went off about 5 going to 6... walking aimlessly at heartland mall... bought ice cream and enjoying it while walking and waiting for my ride... haha.... dats is the end of my vesek day... haha....

done some thinking... realise i had many to think through.... ever since this year start... i did not really use my brains and eyes to face this world.... i basically based on my own feelings.... thus ... somehow i misunderstood, i offend some people, make people angry.... i am really sorry... but i know nothing can reverse it back.... from now i will use my brain to think through first before deciding on things... i used to analysis quite alot... however i find it tiring... so i stop it this year... but somehow i cant do that... i not sure lar... haix....

dance... ballet dance... should i quit .... i am not sure.... i am not sure if i quit will my studies and piano be better... or it will not make much a difference... i really not sure... i love dance alot.... but haix.... i know, in life sacrifices are needed to be made but it is really a tough decision... so this week i have thought of the pros and cons.... it seems that i have quite a clear decision... but somehow i am reluctant to choose that decision.... haix.... when can i come to terms .....

last week taught me something... is it that in life, things may not always goes the way you want it to be and also history repeats itself.... unexpected things happen... sometimes it can suprise you and make your day... but sometimes it will give you a shock and make you cry.... somehow i feel like running from everything... living in a world filled with self-denial .... but i realise i had to wake up.... faced it and move on... currently i am doing so.... but it is tough... tough.... stress level will go up and i know my family members will be affected which i wished it will not be the case...

oh yea also time wait for no man.... once the chance is gone... it will be gone forever... so to all people... if you see a chance in anything... grab it quick and treasure it... don't lose it... i did not treasure my chance and now i regret... but what to do... i think the worse thing is i commit the mistake twice... i allow history to repeat twice... i hope after this incident i will learn and not to commit again.... haix... what a waste....

lets hope that this week will be a better week for everyone... hope that everyone will live their life to the fullest with no regrets.... oh yea and to all J2s in SRJC... jia you and gd luck.... do not stress yourself too much and tak care.... all the best... :).....

2008-05-12T22:47:00.000+08:00

yo... haha late for my one week blogging time... kind of busy lately... oh well.....last week was full of sadness, laughther and great sense of achievement....

haha... let's start with NAFA first... hehe... i done my five item test last wed... haha it was not bad.... here's the score....

sit-up 49- A (haha... actually wanted to hit 50 de... sian)
sit and reach - 49 - A (erm if i never get wrong...haha....)
standing board jump - 203 - A (haha.. love this score...)
shuttle run - 10.3s - A (haha.... great improvement)
inclined pull-up - 18 - A (just made the mark... haha...)

haha.... though i had in mind to achieve all As that day... as i was sick, i thought i cannot make it... but wooo hoo... i made it... haha... so happy... love my shuttle run and STB.. improve greatly... haha....

next in line is the sr musical presentation ceremony.... haha... everyone that help or perform... all will have cert... haha... can keep it as memento... haha... actually i did not expected a cert for the musical... thanks sr.... haha... anyway... they prepared a reception for us... so cool... love the chocolate eclair...haha... so fast sold out lor... haha... after that watch a preview of the musical... so nice... haha... many people were enjoying that preview lor... hear laughter everywhere.... haha...

last but not lest... is the farewell party for J2 dancers and robelle... ahh... i so miss them.... J2 dancers are a very fun lot of people... love them lots... thanks so much... and jia you for mid -yrs and A level this year... haha... and to robelle... i miss you so much.... suddenly in sch cant see you liao... not used to it... you are such a caring friend... :(.... anyway... during the farewell party.. we had pizza and lychee cake... haha...i cant eat much cos need to go home eat dinner... haha... oh yea... i went to play the piano for fun too...haha... den my two of my seniors saw me play too and want to learn... haha... anyway after all the food... we gather and played games... some J1s gals bought the J2s, mr Den and robelle crowns and nice princess-like headband... very cool...haha... den we play zhong ji mi ma... haha... loser have to drink something that william mix... it is super disgusting lor... luckily i never kena... haha... then robelle had to go off... maria and me gave her the present... it is a collage of the musicals photos with quite a no of dancers' message... also we gave her a 'boggie' pencil case, a bookmark and a ring of photos... hope she like it... lastly when the farewell ending... nobody wanted to leave... all kept finding something to do... yea... that is what a farewell suppose to be lar... very sad lor... :(....

hope i can start studying soon... currently still very slacky... sian... had to work... must jia you.... mid yr coming here....

2008-05-04T19:55:00.000+08:00

yox.... this week is AWESOME.... whole week with mind filled with musical songs and dance.....

yesterday was 3rd May and it is the day that SR musical is showcased.... it was AWESOME.... love SR musical... felt very nervous for the evening performance.... thanks to all the hand shakes and hugs from everyone.... Love all the musical cast from dance team to acting cast to choir to musical groups to backstage and wardrobe crew ... haha.... will miss all of u guys alot.... in the evening performance finale.... i could felt tears in my eyes ler.... very sad that it is over.... will treasure all the moments i had with all the cast as well. moments from practices to rehearsals to the actual day.... many things had happen... i cant name it alll... but i have enjoyed every single moments....

gain alot from musical.... because of musical i make new friends.... because of musical dance team were bonded even further.... because of musical i know that people care for one another... because of musical i learn that hard work will paid off.... because of musical i know that many teachers and students in SRJC can act, sing or dance.... Good job SRjcians.... haha.....

For my Dance Team...Mr Den... thanks for the teaching, paitience, jokes and rose .... Mr Willy... though i am not in the hip hop dance item... thanks for all the exercises and you made me love hip hop even more... oh yea... love all dancers alot... thanks for all the hugs... J2s and all the seniors.... thanks for everything you did for the J1s... thanks for having the paitience to teach us the dance steps... thanks for creating laughter in between tiring practices....enjoy dancing with all of you.... going to miss you dancers so much.... hope and wish we can meet more often in sch or outside sch... jia you to all J2s... good luck for ur As... and i believe this batch of J1s will bring SR dance into greater height... jia you....

oh yea... robelle going back to her country soon... gal... i will miss you so much.... you like a big sis to me... thanks for all the care you gave me these two months.... thanks for bearing with my craziness and nonsense... thanks for all gal... love you lots and will miss you so much....

erm... will upload the photos next tym...

2008-04-27T21:39:00.000+08:00

A week past.... back to blogging.... k this week is a very busy week for me.... with musical rehearsals, piano pratices and plenty of tests.... sian.... how am i able to cope....going to go bonkers soon....

yea... got to apologise for my recent crazy as well as insensitive behaviour.... recently been talking and behaving without going through the process of thinking... i am very sorry.... i also find out that ever since i come to jc.... i became a very different person.... erm one who is more outspoken bah.... but then i really do not know if this is a good thing....sian.... i am very confused.....

yea.... recently i had been thinking about whether to quit ballet dance... jc life is hectic.... and for now i already cant cope with it.... though now only have tests... but all the tests result are not what I expected... i am not so sure if it i because i had too much external enrichment courses or that the musical is rehearsals are taking up my time till i have no time for study... i am realli not sure... i guess i will hold on to this thought until musical is over....

last lap for musical ler.... haha.... i have mixed feelings about the last lap... happy that the day will soon come so that later i can focus on studies.... sad that the J2 will be leaving after the musical.... afraid that i willl screw up on that day.... haha.... so for now i will strive hard to train my dance(but i got no time :( ...) sian.... haha...

oh yea... my com crashed liao... now using bro's laptop... dunnoe who go send virus to my com... sian lor... realli feel like scolding ppl who created virus... sian... but wat to do... i scold liao my com also wun be repair.... sian lar....

had a little argument with her lately... becos of sth.... i now lose trust from her... sian lar... now i am trying hard to get her trust back.... but it going to take awhile.... sometime i realli wish she will support me more... i know she care.... but sian....

2008-04-20T22:38:00.000+08:00

hi... long time no blog... haha... this week is kinda entertaining for me... cause lots of events happening mah... haha... it is also kinda stressful... especially on friday with three tests on that day.... sian i dun think this week tests i will do well... cause none of them i revise it very well... sian .... thats is what jc life is all about i guess....

haha... anyway... biggest event this week is the sr olymics.... haha.... i love street battle.... haha though i end up making my toe blue black.... haha.... anyway draco did not won.... but we enjoy ourselves... haha... made lots of new friends form street battle too... haha... anyway... on that day, i was super busy throughout the whole day... till i had no time for lunch.... haha...

in the morning, i had the marching then volleyball competition... haha my team kena trashed like siao... sian lor... but i enjoy lar...haha.... then it was the novelty race... my team of six are samuel, jia yi, bernice, vanessa, denis and me... haha.... play play play... in the end we lost... haha... later came the floorball...wah.. this game is very hiong.... very rough... play for 7 mins still no one goal in... both team very good... in the end... all crowd around my team goal post.... anyhow wack then went in.... haha... so tai co lor... haha....

next come the street battle... haha the best part of that day... love hip hop alot... haha... wah aquila very prepared lor... they even had planned their dressing....haha oh yea... i nearly could not recognise some of my dance teammates from aquila... haha they look so different....haha.... anyway draco screwed up the dance in the end but all of us had fun dancing.... haha.... dwayne even did three cheers in the end haha...

about one month in jc liao....so far i can still take it...though sometimes a little stress... but dunnoe why.... the momment i see my friends i will be relaxed again.... haha... love the people in SRJC...they are really great motivators for me... haha... evryone jia you.... oh yea musical coming soon... love it lots.... esp the finale (who doesnt love the finale)... haha....

2008-04-13T13:36:00.000+08:00

yox yox blog... long time never see you already...
haha.... okay here to upload some pics took over the past year and recently....
haha.... k first let me introduce my beloved nephew jin kai.....

haha he cute right....

k my other nephew....

another cutie pie... haha....

haha... i miss 4e4 alot.... but then jc life so hectic cant meet them lor... sianx..... haha... some photo taken from outings....

k this is abit dark.... ahh miss ms leow so much ... she went to peicai ler lor... sian...

haha... our walk to east coast.... so tiring lor....

haha... after the macbeth play.... but the play is not interesting... waste $$$....

haha... this is taken in the toliet where we had a lit seminar ....

hehe... recently had primary school gathering... haha... my primary classmates very united lor... now still have gathering... haha... many people heard i hav primary school gathering.... they go "huh"....haha... k .... i miss them alot......haha... we had gathering at sam's house....

haha... here is the nicest group photo... took alot but others cant see all the people faces.... haha...

oh hoh... gambling... haha....

b gang.... haha.... these few guys...

compare to previous... girls have more power.... cos more people mah... haha...

haha.... with our capable junyi and baoyi.... look how successful this gathering turn out...haha

k i and off today picture tour with two of scenery pics i took....

sunset....

east coast beach....

2008-03-24T21:56:00.001+08:00

erm... k now i having a new link.... actually there is not much difference... anyway kinda emo today.... run for about 3 km... run with empty stomach plus very little sleep... so the run did not turn out well.... sorry for troubling others.... i am sorry.... anyway thats should be all for today.... will update more next time... yea....

2007-12-18T15:23:00.000+08:00

yoxx... back from hongkong...
haha... super fun lor....
wish i could stay dere longer...

day 1...
SQ flight landed... haha... first time sit SQ....
so shuang... but den cant play the mahjong game....so ke xi...
k...at HK airport met lang zai...kenji aka tian ji...jkjk....haha....
best tourguide eva... haha....
den went to our 5 star hotel....
but den no facilties wan lor...
toilet nida go until10 floor...
no swimming pool...
oh well nvrm....
den at nite went shopping....
woah tis my longest shopping trip eva....
went to ladies street... long yang kai....etc....
haha.... brought 2 bags... 3 shoes... 6 shirts...
haha... so mani lor....

day 2....
went some sightseeing with Kenji....
on bus... he told us all the ba gua xin wen... super funni lor...
den sat MTR (i did not spell wrongly dey call MTR dere...) to shenzhen...
woah we super ting tei lor...
luagge everywhere... haha...
oh well the trip was long...
so i read some 4D results dere... trying to be lik the radio....haha...
den sae gd bye to lang zai.... :(
met lao lui dere.... everybody dun quite lik her...
so we call her lao lui lor...haha...
quite bad hor...
haha.... anyway dat nite shop in shenzhen...
one funni thing... my friend rachel... super clumsy...
she drop one lollipop and break a little... den she had to pay...
50 remingbi lor... so much...ex lesson... haa....
haha.... tot shenzhen will be some ulu place but wow....
full of vibrance...haha....

day3...
went window of the world...erm sth lik dat...
haha.... super fun lar...
in a few hours its seems lik u been to the whole world...
haha... dere oso got roller coaster and log fume...
oh yea saw a nice water fall and rainbow by it...
but so sad... camera malfunction do hav the pic... :(
den went to xiao ren guo....
sat a train around.... i sat with lang luoi joyce... sing tour leader...
all the sulpture so small....haha...

den at nite most fun de....
illegal gang activities...
gangleader: frank heng aka daddy...
haha.... walk backstreet... saw dog meat....
hang around outside 7-11 and eat... haha...
dad even pretend to be beggars.... haha....
one of a european tourist actually believe haha....
almost gave us $$$.... and try to speak with us chinese too....hah....

day4...
disneyland dae....
meet up with lang zai again....
haixxx... tis dae bro ivan sick... so he kept sleeping....
did not play much...
anyway nth to play oso...
onli one roller coaster... others quite kiddy de...
the place quite small... how i wish can go US de...haha...
but the fireworks super awesome....
is storylike and mani variety...
haha... oso super crowded...haa...

day5...
went to tong men...i tink...
all factory outlet dere...
haha... brought a adidas bag dere... but dun quite lik the colour...
but den my bag spolit ler so nid wan...
haha... went seven buy jeans.... oh yea my bro brought shoes at adidas too...
ltr went bac hotel den airport again lor....
haha....
took nite flight...
so cool.... on the plane i could see stars....
den whole sky full of stars... so nice...
but dats onli for HK sky... sing sky veri little stars... sianzzz...

k dats about all...
haha nxt tym i upload photos...haha...

2007-12-04T00:37:00.000+08:00

erm... nothing much lately... just that today my closest bro went to KL ler... his band peeps oso went ler... Hope they will have a safe journey and a enjoyable time... hahha....

yesterday had an awesome family day...

went to tp safra club... hahah...

bro went swiming... dad pretending to be life guard....

change to swim wear ler... but nvr get wet haha...

mi and mum dont feel like swimming then just sit and watch lor...

later went to snack bar to ma kan... haha... out of all restaurants we went to snack bar...haha...
the food quite ex lor...
anyway... later went to play darts wow...
super cool lor... haha... i kept winning...
hehe... super lucky lor.... haha.. but not a bad game lar...

haha... 9 days to hk... cant wait...

*actually post shld be ytd but house tio shock.. so...yea*

2007-11-30T06:52:00.000+08:00

about a wk had past...haha.... sort of veri sianz to blog... but nw got nth beta to do.... so blog lor... haha...

first ... my grade six ballet had not settle yet... sianzzz.... dunnoe if i can do or not.... i realli wish i could but den haixxx.... i still had not made the requirements yet... zhi hao jia you lor....

recently...
home is only a house
warm on the outside
cold within
with brother that orders sister around
another that show cold love
a lady that shouts all day
a men that dinks all night
and a girl that cuddles herself up and cry....
yeah... a home that is just a house...

rambling through thoughts... i found out the past have not been forgotten... but i have decided to let it go.... and move on to a new life.... pick myself up and continue this path of my life.... holding back do nothing good only harm..... yeah...

haha.... alwin leaving for states nw... so xian mu lor... want to go states soooooo much...... haha.... bon voyage...tak care.....

2007-11-21T20:50:00.000+08:00

haha... long time no blog... k... first o lvl over ler... quite happy... but kinda lost.... yea.... anyway dun bother about it ler....

haha.... last two days... went out for chalet.... sooo shoik..... played pool and shoppin.... eat and many other card games.... can say quite fun lar... but somehow still felt bored.... haha.... wah first day went to beach.... so muddy lor... then got all my precious bite there... haha.... sherry kept complaining too.... oh yeah thanks alot sherry....

last friday... went back to school for pae.... but what the point lor.. i also not going any jc for first six weeks... wait... i cant even go... yea... haha... but the fun part is that friday night...haha... love it lor... council farewell party rocks.... so happy.... haha... lots of fun though only with sec 4 peeps and some sec 3.... but it is still hilarious... shant elaborate... haha love the flower too...

oh yea... gona refresh my blog with pics too... coming soon... wait for it okay... hehe....

2007-08-09T22:17:00.000+08:00

happy birthday singapore... haha... todae's parade not bad... hehe the roller blader fell... hope hes alright...oh yea... love the high tech kites.... saw it last tym b4 when they were practising haha.... its awesome.... oh yea that gadget can be brought.... but its so ex... hehe my friends go buy it... hes rich sia... hundred dollars lor... haix... cant see the fireworks from mi house liao... last yr still can...

long tym nvr write in... things change lately... mainly my own mood bah... been down and confused lately... i am lost i do not where to go.. i noe at tis point i should concentrate on my studies.... but some how i cant focus... i realli wish i could soon....

oh yea.. ytd cross country did not end quite well for mi... scolded my bro... dunnoe y.... he did something not right but it is not entirely very wrong either.... but i just shouted at him.. i even stormed off leaving him behind with his friends.... haixxx.....guess i just need some time .... a time to be alone and cry my sadness out.... yea...

done many thinking lately.... felt loniness for quite some times....i just i really have to move on... pluck up courage... ignore what others would say....and believe in myself....i hate my own feeling but well at this point i will have to ignore it and focus on my studies...study study study... must go nyjc....yea....

haha... going to vivo and watch SSO perform tis sat....yay.....

2007-07-15T18:09:00.000+08:00

hey hey... a week past... this week quite slack... not much homework too... hehe.... mondae was jinkai birthday... happy birthday jinkai.... hope all ur dreams come true....haha...

gd news... i am out of SDL.... haha... so happi.... but still have to work to my goal....
bad news... mock prelim chem, maths and bio paper took back ler... hais.... not good at all... esp chem... fail lik hell.... haix... a moment i thought of giving up.... i realli dunnoe how to continue... or maybe i should say i am too tired to continue.... anyway... thanks for zhi xian.... encourage me to work harder...will always remeber what you tell me... thanks.... oh yea for you.... cheer up too.... smile more...haha....

oh yea... for past few wks... my dance wasnt so gd... kept screwing up my center.... thoguh bar was okie.... anyway... i decide to have a good posture from now.... first to straighten my back and to train for my dance...haha.... oh yea.... i got a better mattress ler... last tym one... too thin ler... make my back hurt even more... now beta can sleep well ler yeahpeee....

2007-07-07T07:57:00.000+08:00

haha....long time no see... haha.... this week have been a busy week for me plus my family and maybe my friends too.... it is a week of exams and many adminstration stuff to handle... oh yeah... i went for a celebration too....

first... mock prelims finally OVER... haha i am so glad man...i have study much harder than usual but due to the many admin stuff to handle, my revision was sort of held back too.... haix... anyway... i try my very best... hope my results will be much better then... oh yea... finished my chinese o level oral too.... haha i read the first half of the passage so fluently but the second half went hay-wired.... haha hope the examiner will be lenient... about the convo... i was shocked when the question was ask... it was so difficut...it was about government policy on helping the handicapped... i agree but besides saying about he slope... what else could i say... so it was totally crapping...

oh yeah sherry's birthday... HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHERRY.... sweet 16 ler huh.... must zhang da ler hoh.... haha.... anyway went to parway parade and east coast on sherry's bd.... went to MOS eat... haha... my food came the slowest... do beef really need to be cook so long... anyway... later we went to east coast...woah it such a long way there lor.... walk until my feet were aching... haha.... got there... then we started building sandcastle.... it may seems childish... but no choice it was what the bd gal wants... haha.... but had quite some fun there lar... later went to emo at the rock dam... haha.. no lar... just sat there and sang song chit-chat.... haha... we had waves as the audience... haha... so wild imagination... and we are the PFS... haha pakmeng.... felicia... and sherry.... haha.... end off with many photo taking.... haha.... hope sherry had lots of fun... for me... i emjoyed so much... never been out for so long before...

career seminar... boring but quite informative lar... got clearer view of where i want to go... i think if jc i would go nanyang if poly will be tp bah... the tourism and hospitailty sector... anyway... for now just work really hard... oh yeah... had to go back to SDL again.. dread...

2007-06-20T17:03:00.000+08:00

Hi... long time never write in to my blog ler...
Haha... thought that so long never change blog skin so decided to change...
But very hard to find a suitable one... finally found this... best.... suits me...

Anyway... these few days nothing much happen.... now school holidays lor.... But have to go back to school for 2 wks... not onli that... have to attend 3 seminars and 1 work shop plus abt two bio extra lessons... haixx.... after all these still have to mug for the up coming mock prelims... haixxx...busy busy busy....haha...

Oh yea... dunnoe why but cant seems to sleep well these two wks.... either cant fall asleep... or wake up from sleep many times...or not is having weird dreams while sleeping.. hope I will be able to catch some gd sleep soon...

I tink I will not write much until the o lvl has ended...

2007-05-27T15:09:00.000+08:00

tis week quite busy....
haha.... wednesday best night ever.... went to DBS arts center to watch macbeth play....
the play is so boring... make me want to sleep....haha.... it makes my teacher leave at the intermission...so boring lor...
haha luckily the nightlife at clarke quay save this boring day... after the play... sherry, pak meng, zoey, hui ying, jaslin, careen, valerie, priscilla and me roam along the singapore river....woah the night life is so beautiful and colourful... haha... saw some guys flying kites... this kites veri special... its remote-controlled and is lighted.... so nice....so beuatiful.... stood there awhile then we moved on...
went to sat at the staris beside the river... so nice but scary... scared will drop into the river... haha.... luckily never....
then went to burger king and had supper there.... haha... turkey bacon ... my favourite.... hehe.... had lots of fun.... how i wish i can go out more often....

thursday... went back to my primary school.... haha... met many of my teacher.... my brother also met his teachers... many of hte teachers said he shuai ler... haha indeed... some still encourage him to join xiao yuan superstar...haha... my bro diam diam nothing to say....
haha.... primary school did not change much.... hehe had a feeling to explore my school at night.... very nice... found out my school had a great spot to gaze stars... wooo....
oh yea... a sad news.... the birds our school used to kept no longer there ler... so sad... they used to be my pets... haha took care of them for quite some time... miss them....

oh yea tmr chinese olvl ler.... ahh i veri scared.... hope i will be able to get A1... i realli hope.... jia you...to all sec 4 who are taking olvl tmr.... wish ya gd luck.... jia you... and dun panic... yea.....

2007-05-20T08:42:00.000+08:00

this week not much things happen....

in school as usual...study...study and study....but no SDL... haha so happi...
yea my chinese improve ... mid year total results is B4... 62...
but then it was oral that pull mi up... paper 2 still fail...
never mind next time must try harder... jia you...

okie ytd went to the lit seminar... both for Joy Luck Club and Macbeth...
JLC one was okie... still learnt something.... however... for the Macbeth practically nothing learn... futhermore... the lecturer gave wrong info... was very boring and it just a waste of time and money...
oh yea... met two of my primary school friends at the lit seminar... haha... had quite a shock... so long nvr see them ler... actually met up in a lit seminar... what a coincidence... haha...

u appear again when i totally forget you...
but now the nice had turn ugly
and the likes to dislikes....

2007-05-14T05:28:00.000+08:00

Haha... a little late to blog... wanted to blog ytd but busy studying... wooo... I finally studying ler... haha....

Okie last sat was fun... HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY.... went to uncle’s house to celebrate that special day.... it was a pot luck dinner... my family brought curry fish head... woah it was awesome man... the spice was just right for me...haha... ate my cous’s honeydew sago too... it was not bad...

after my dinner... it was play tym wif mi beloved nephew jin kai...haha... he sang mani songs and mi bro recorded it all...haha he sang until so cute....

now cum the best part... mi, bros and cous play mahjong...haha...so fun... but den for mi the fun start onli aft two hours of playin... cos onli aft two hrs den I win.... ahhhh... so poor thing... haha.... guess I am not cut out to be a gambler..haha... on the other hand... mi youngest bro... won at lest abt 4 tym... pro....

haha gona share my qoute today in sch.... 千金难买一回头.... cherish what you have now before it is gone...

2007-05-11T22:31:00.000+08:00

Okie haha today… here to write some happy stuff… hehe requested by jeryl… haha… okie first mus write tis… if not maybe she will kill mi okie… jkjk… todae I walked to inertchange wif jeryl… haha so HAPPI …. Hehe… seriously its quite some tym I nvr go walk bac home wif her ler…kinda miss those daes…

Haha… so happi todae can go home early…. Long tym nvr lik dat ler… miss home…. Okie… haha… oh yea… I find out a very nice chi book in the library… its mian bao shu de nui hai…. The story is nice… determine to read it finish… hope it can help mi improve mi chi too… haha….

I LOVE FALL OUT BOYS… they rocks… luv their song… haha… dunnoe why but this yr I had craze over eng rock songs… yea…haha…oh yea change blog song to "Thanks for the memories" by FALL OUT BOY... of course... haha...(very random hoh)

Quite emo lately… dunnoe why just felt lik crying…. But tis tym soon gona over… I will wake up soon… I will be back to reality soon….

2007-05-02T23:34:00.000+08:00

A wet day dae today…. Early morning so cold… almost goin to freeze ler… luckily got jacket… haha….

Haix todae leg aching…. Tis tym it ache a lot… and the ache is veri sharp… tot of going to see the doc… but den got sdl…. Needa complete 9 hours tis wk… how am I able to do so… haixx… so sian lor….

Todae sdl… as usual… one word sian…. Aft I finshed all my hw and music theory… I still got plenty of time lar… den… haha went to tak some books to draw those pictures in the book… omg…. I offended copyright law… haha… okie dats lame….

Oh yea… todae met one of mi primary sch friend… woah she change quite a lot…. Haha change become more beautiful and cooler… haha… miss mi primary sch mates…

How I wish time could go back… all my memories were in the past two years… All my smiles were hidden in those times…. How I wish time could turn back….

Miss my sec 2 and 3 life….

2007-05-01T14:07:00.000+08:00

haixxx.... received one disappointing news ytd... heard dat zhsscldds got bronze... haixx.... why like tis.... i tot we did veri well... in fact we did beta den last yr and the yr b4.... why... why onli bronze.... haixxx.... i am not sad but just disappointed and a little angry.... i expect more... no mi cl friends expected more.... but why it turn out like tis... ytd i flash back to the time when all the sec 4 cl members and one sec 3 member work for tis syf.... even those dat are usually slacking work veri hard too.... most of us put in all our soul in this production... heart beats faster when contest drawing near.... each support one another... one help one another... haisss.... all these hardwork... why it does not seems to pay off... now we get bronze onli.... people will even agree dat we are a bunch of nothing.... but no okie.... u cant deduce things tis way.... cl is not a slacking cca... we work....

erm let mi end off wif something beta lar... maybe zhss goin to hav a prom nite for tis yr sec 4.... haha.... hope we get a gd one...

2007-04-09T22:08:00.000+08:00

todae... had not been well... woke up quite early....because of sth... mood totally drenched... haixx.... shan't talk about it...

anyway todae is 2.4 km... went there wif bro's band peeps... sam...yvvonne....matthew...kai iang...and ian... haha.... finally knew matthew can be so lame... haha.... anyway... reach punggol park quite early... so slack a little beside the pond... haha... todae run was quite gd lar... haixx... but quite disappointing.... miss by 1 sec i can get gold ler... haixxx.... but at lest i pass lar... jus dat... my wish for every yr gold is gone... yea... so a little heart broken..... haha found out dat zhss ppl realli know how to enjoy themselves... hehe... shall not elaborate much...

Had been wondering about these questions these few days? Here they are: what is the meaning of love? Have people take this word too lightly? Does a little affection meant love? If not, then, how will you ever judge if someone really love you or how will you know if you really love that person? haixx.... i really dunnoe wats everything... lost...

little smile = biggest joy

2007-04-07T23:13:00.000+08:00

tis wk quite tiring... a little busy too... nafa wk mah...

haha mondae nth much lar... onli went to do mi sport leader duty lor... haha... woah some sec 2 guys so pro lar ... do so mani sit up....haha... so xian mu... hehe....

tuesdae cl.... did not act dat well... but haha improve a little... and the back drop arrangement is done...

wednesdae... woah... most tiring one... haha.... nafa test... horray for miself... opps too bhb.... anyway i did well for tis yr nafa five item test men.... sit up- 41.... sit and reach-49.... inclined pull up-18....shutter run-11.1sec.... and last but not lest... standing board jump-199cm.... haha so happi... alll A... yeah... hehe.... luv mi standing broad jump the best.... broke mi p4 record of 184... hahha... emerge best female jumper in 4e4 too.... haha but i tink kinda tyco lar... did not expect to jump dat well... haha.... anyway....now i left the passing or a B grade of 2.4.... den i will fulfill my wish of getting a Gold.... yeah... jia you....haha now mi whole body aching.... hope i recover soon....

Thursdae nth much... onli cl.... actually got bio ssp but cancel... haha.... cl was fun... mi role now more fun to act... more emotions.... and more stuff dat will catch the audience attention... erm provided i do it right.... haha... jia you...

oh yea... sori abt some of the contents in the previous post... i will try to be more sensitive... sori

당신을 잊으십시오

2007-03-31T10:09:00.000+08:00

Change blogskin ler.... tot dat long tym nvr change blogskin ler plus... this quite suits mi ... so yea i change mi blogskin...

tis wk...a little busy.... jus ended sports dae... wah bishan stadium is so cool... haha.... oh yea... i did not realli do duty too... ai yah.. tell them den wun listen den oso suan ler.... anyway dey nvr fight or create big trouble i hapi ler... haha i will end this up in a better tone.... council spirits ... haha so united.... we took pics together... ltr ziyu suggested to run one round of the stadium and cheer out loud... and the whole council did.... haha so happi lar... ltr took pics again.... haha i split again... hehe tis tym do together wif a sec one councillor... haha so fun....

haixxx... ltr gona tak progress report ler... sure veri bad de... oh yea maybe i will be in the sdl scheme too... haixxx.... not sure lar... but anyway if i have... it oso benefit mi... i guess... so nvrm....anyway... i hope mum will not complain much... and believe her daughter more....

2007-03-25T08:50:00.000+08:00

haixxx.... no choice but to change to new blogger.... nvrm... hahaha.... i am back again...

hehe... learning carnival just over.... it was quite an exciting event to participate... i am very proud of 4e4... three cheers for 4e4....for winning two awards... best class cheer and CHAMPION for lit evening....haha.... so happy....

lit evening was great... i love the movie ... so touching.... "i want fruit drops"...haha... but from the movie screening... i realised that zhss ppl are veri ahem ahem.... haha should not sae it out in the open....

I luv the workshop on managing stress too... haha i am a 'S' person...I find it quite true... haha... "let's do it altogether..."

haha... Drama appreciation... learn alot from there... information that can brush up my acting skills... "no anticipation"... i have learn this skill... haha... 4e4 had lots of fun too... laugh like hell... when we play some sort of a catching game... haha....

haha our class tee was terrific... i luv it... hehe... however... we are not allow to wear it... so whats the point of having a class tee... school rules are realli begining to pile up quite quickly...haixxx

haixx... it really a pity that i did not get to attend the LOST @ Serangoon... my friends who attend all have loads of fun... how i wished i could... but i have to attend to my grade 8 exam....

talking abt grade 8 exam.... i suck at it.... the exam stinks... i will sure get a fail... but i thought it through... this result was not important anymore... i going look to the futrue... and strive hard for the future.... yeah that is going to be what i am going to do....

Lately... i have been bombared wif the same question.... haixxx.... making mi so irritated....
Stop asking ler can.....

2007-03-09T05:23:00.000+08:00

Sorry... last few wks or mths... i had not update... cos mi internet is down.... so shit lar....

haixxx... recently mani things happen.... mainly bad lar.... haixxx.... anyway thoes are long over.....

haixxx.... tis wk i realli dun feel well... be it physically...mentally...or emotionally... haixxx.... ytd the prize givin was lik shit.... i and my partners screwded up lik shit lar.... haixxx... i hate mi self.... i feel so useless.... a sec 4 ler still dunnoe how to stay cum when sth crops up..... haixxxx.... demote mi to sec 1 lar.... i dun deserve to be a sec 4.... haixxx..... i dunnoe lar.... too confused ler.... now hope dat the prob will be solve.... i realli hope.... if not i will go berserk again....

guess todae wun hav mood to study ler.... lit test ... haixxx.... fail it lar.....

lose my ability to smile

2007-02-12T03:55:00.000+08:00

haha.... last fridae was release of olvl results.... haha... dunnoe y i was veri nervous too... kept prayin for the sec 4s and sec 3 higher chi ppl.... heart was beatin veri fast lar... haa.... omg tis yr the sec 4 do veri well lor.... so mani ppl got 5 a1 and above... haixxx... tis mean tis yr the sec 4 mus do even better... ah i am so stress up.... but glad dat the secs 4 had done well... gd luck to sec 4 `o6 and jia you to sec 4 `o7.... hhahhah.....

haix last fridae i was not in a gd mood at all... veri pek check.... but no reason wan.... haisss.... wasnt feelin welll too.... hardly can breathe and gettin numb again... ai yoh y i lik dat... haixxx dunnoe lar..... i

s tis our last gdbye....

2007-02-11T08:03:00.000+08:00

haha.... last fridae was release of olvl results....

haha... dunnoe y i was veri nervous too... kept prayin for the sec 4s and sec 3 higher chi ppl.... heart was beatin veri fast lar... haa.... omg tis yr the sec 4 do veri well lor.... so mani ppl got 5 a1 and above... haixxx... tis mean tis yr the sec 4 mus do even better... ah i am so stress up.... but glad dat the secs 4 had done well... gd luck to sec 4 `o6 and jia you to sec 4 `o7.... hhahhah.....

haix last fridae i was not in a gd mood at all... veri pek check.... but no reason wan.... haisss.... wasnt feelin welll too.... hardly can breathe and gettin numb again... ai yoh y i lik dat... haixxx dunnoe lar.....

is tis our last gdbye....

2007-02-05T05:43:00.000+08:00

sori for deleteing the previous post... anyway i dun even noe wat i writin abt for the last post... den again its all the past... nth much...

Let me forget all...Let me move on... Let u live well...Let u hav the freedom den i can hav mine....

one last cry....

2007-01-21T08:44:00.000+08:00

2nd post in 2007...

haha last fridae i went to NGEE ANN POLY....
wah dat place is super cool and big sia....
first we went to watch a short clip...
den later we went to tour around the campus....
we went to the convention center first...
here all the courses are displayed for us to ask questions...
haha not much of mi choice...
but i will lik biotechnology or psychology...

haha den zy want to drink bubble tea...
haha we thought is in the canteen but it is not...
later got one nice poly guy brought us dere...
is in the library... the library so nice lar....
beta then outside one...

den we go and c all the cca...
wah all veri cool man...
but i luv hip hop the most...
haha....

later went to hear taufik singing....
wah veri crowded lor...
i squeeze inside...
after a while i cant take it...
den i went away....
mi illness cum again...
den huiying and amanda pei mi...
after dat saw sherry dey all ler...
den i slowly make mi way bac...
it was quite hard as mi legs were lik jelly...
haha... thnks for all the help...
anyway, i will be alrite the.....
dunnid to worry abt mi...
thnks for all those hu are concern abt mi....

像诗人依赖著月亮

2007-01-10T04:50:00.000+08:00

haha long tym no write in... yea its 2007....

haha i am 16 ler sweet 16... okie first i wana thnks all hu wish mi a happi bd as well as those that give mi presents...haha... first to wish mi is zhi xian... thnks hahha

on phone.... zhi xian.... hui ying(xps)....Junyi....dilys...alwin

on blog...valerie...huiying(xps)...xinni....qingting...cheryl...

on friendster...randolph...audrey...Bala...

on msn...joanna...jeryl...zi xun.... bala...ivy....shiyuan...

thnks sherry,pm,jeryl for the presents and mi relative and other priends too... thnks all...

haha... now for mi party...haha it was fun... can meet wif mi cous mah.... haha.... tis party i did not help much.... maybe i did.... cos i becum babysitter again.... i tak care six children altogether... haha... the youngest is onli about a few mths old....hahah.... yea saw mi deear kaikai again... haha he grown cuter... he gav mi one name... call ah bee... hahha.... veri funi kid man... love him lots...

after i ate mi own dinner... i talk wif mi cous kelly... haha long tym nvr see ler...later at 9 it was tym to cut cake... haha mi niece joey lve the cake alot.... cant wait for mi to blow the candle off and eat the cake... haha....den it happen sth... mi aunt spray the foam... accidentally it went into mi mouth... den cant breath well.... hahha mi nurse cous help mi out... thnks gal....haha the cake was awesome...

later went to talk to mi nurse cous.... haha long tym no c and chat ler.... one advice she gav mi let nature tak its course....

1am... i went to wait for bro outside the lan with dilys.... haha... there is these group of guys kept walkin to and fro in front of mi.. dunnoe wat dey want.... i tink dey want mi no cos one of them sae so.... hahaha..... haixxx....nvr get it in the end... haha i kept wondering... i was not veri choi wat y wan mi no.... hahaha....

let nature take its course

2006-12-26T00:42:00.000+08:00

Before christmas... i kept wondering how would i spent mi tis yr christmas....
cos mani friends... busy liao... or had to go holidae.... now i noe how it ois spent...

tis yr christmas... quite unsual for mi... i am busy wif "jiu song", funeral....
mi great grand father passed away and mi third aunt's husband too...
from last fridae to todae i busy attending wake... kinda sad...

dere at mi great grand father wake... i met mani new ppl...
found out got a sec 1 uncle... haha... a sec 4 gal call a sec1 guy uncle...
hehee.... talk to some of mi great aunt... and play wif mi two cous...
haha don and deon.... don loves mi lots and mi loves him too.
dere kept prayin and walkin... veri tired... we walk lots of rounds...
the track dat we walk is in a zigzag way... cos too mani ppl ler...
i tink abt 100 + ppl bah...

aft four busy daes... i finally can rest...

2006-12-08T21:49:00.000+08:00

haha... cum bac from holidae ler...

okie first dae...went to kovan tak the bus go to melaka lor...
haha tot late but not lar... was quite early...
bus trip was so bored lar...haa i sleep the whole trip hehe..
i am a pig again...haha i whole body numb aft dat...
guess is mi punishment for sleepin too much bah...
around afternoon reach the resort...
den sat the banana truck... wah the truck damn fast lah...
blow until mi hair all messy ler...
den mi other friends went to swim in the personal pool...
dat pool stinks man.. haha luckily i nvr swim...
haha mi voluteer to be a camera woman not bad huh...
nite we went to cowboy town...haha...
go dere ate lamb chop... play bumper car... watch red indian show...
watch fire works.... play bowling....
the red idian show was nice... haa mi family is the most enthu wan...
fire works was great .... i luv the finale it was lik shootin stars....
bowlin okie lar... haha learn how to play ler... thnks dad mi coach...

sec dae... we went to water world.... haha sooo fun lar....
play wave pool... went to a castle...haha am i a princess....
de slide dere soo cool... haha but the climbing of stairs so tirin...
the family ride was awesome... i and mum kept flying...haha soo cool...
haix... mi whole family dare not try the 7 storey slide... dat one can fly in the air wan...
haha sooo scary... hehe... all the kids play until veri tired ler...i achin all the way... but its fun....nite we went to cowboytown again... to watch 4D movie...haix... the movie sucks...
not nice one lor... sing beta though it is in 3D... oh yea... watch fireworks again...
den went play pool.... mi pool skills sucks lar....ppl kept lookin at mi play...
haha den went bac to villa and slept lik a pig...

third dae.... nth much .... ate breakfast check out.... and went up the bus...
hehe tis tym i nvr sleep... play poker cards all the way... play tai di...
lastly went bac to sing ler...

hehe... will still rmb dat the no 7 bus hate us alot... the biker dat we wave to..
the friendly no 8... the crazy no 6...haha... luv tis trip...nxt tym will put the pics up...

someone sae i am loner... maybe bah... haixxx...
i reali dunnoe...i dun wan to be... but i jus dun noe how to communciate bah...
i reali wish someone will teach mi...but i noe these things cant be taught...
haixxx... mi a useless loner...

2006-12-04T22:19:00.000+08:00

haha busy dae todae....

early mornin... went to tts...
haha usual thing lar...
haixx... wait damn long for the medicine lor...

den ltr went bac to hougang point...
buy all the stuff needed for tmr holidae...
haha we were quarrell over magiee mee...
hehe.. i took the mee goreng wan....

den went bac learn piano...
den later went pack mi stuff...
her i was muti taskin...
pack bag... eat dinner....watch tv... chat on msn...listen music....
haha i pro rite...

yeah tmr goin to holidae ler...
gona be fun.... i stayin in bungalow...
haha...

tmr 6 mus wake up ler...haha gota sleep..bb
when i am bac... lets talk abt mi trip

hope everybody is alrite....
i dun wan anywan to be hurt...

2006-12-03T01:00:00.000+08:00

Haha... todae went out again....

first at home hav piano lesson...
haixx... bad tym again....
every piano lesson... i get nervous....
den i went numb or either stomach achin lik siao....
when will i stop feelin tis...haixx...

den went for dance....
luv it lots... but todae i cant turn leh...
soo sad...
haha sprain mi ankle too...
now still hurtin...
but xi guan ler lar...

ltr went to watch open season...
haha veri funni dat show...
after watchin the show ... went to popular...
i was sooo damn cold... i went to hug a soft dog...
haha.... soo warm...
later went shoppin cos mum wan buy new shoes...

haixx... todae bad thing happen... mi bro kena wack...
wah i hear ler feel lik wackin dat guy bac... but not dat gd lar...
so i nvr... but mi whole family confront dat guy... and talk to him...
he seems lik cryin ler...haixx... no wonder its just a small thing...
sth abt cheatin in game lar... dat guy bu shuang den beat mi bro lor...
he gav mi bro chance ler but mi bro dun listen... both at fault lar...

2006-12-01T23:14:00.000+08:00

haha... todae went out wif family...
a little sad a little hapi... dunnoe lar...

woke up by miself todae...
haha... 1st tym in history...
okie tis nth to cheer abt...
den later went to people's park centre...
haha wore mi new clothes todae....

haixx.... sth happen when we were goin dere...
i tot we took the wrong train so i call mi family to get off the train....
i dunnoe y i did dat...
in actual fact the train we took was correct...
den dey all blame mi...
haixx... wasnt hapi... so curse the train and shout at mi family....
i was bad hoh... haixxx dunnoe lar....
den for todae whole trip dey make fun off mi becos of tis thing... dao mi becos of tis thing....
haixxx...

later went to watch happy feet at ps...
wow dat show veri funi... haha i luv penguins
dey are sooo cute... if i eva meet one i will giv it lots of fish....
haha....

den went kovan... to settle holidae stuff....
haha.... mi bro saw voodoo doll den he wan to buy...
den mi mum wana buy for us too lor....
den i sae okie lor... i choose the for study one...
but i still dun feel its a need to buy...

haixxx.... todae not happi wif family...
y mus dey always blame mi when dere is a mistake happen....
it not dat i wan it to happen... and i am veri sori dat it happen ler...
y mus still make fun of mi and dat incident....
haixxx... i better off being dumb lik wat others had called mi....
haixxxx.....

2006-11-29T10:14:00.000+08:00

haha yeaterdae had mi party....

went to sch.. first zuo bo.... den ltr when weiling cum... i and her went to casey's house and take chicken wing and some other heavy stuff.... haha his ah ma veri nice leh... wana giv us crispy chicken somemore... but we nvr take lar... haha.... den the stuff too heavy liaoxx... took taxi bac to sch...hehe... den prepare all the food... and the guys go start fire... haha fire start onli at 7 wah so late lar... nvrm... ltr i went pokin chicken... haha eatin tym... all had fun and play esp kc and oswell... dey damn funi lar.... play hai dai lik scarin ppl...haha... guess wat i dere jus eat and eat... nvr help bbq wan...bleah... i always every bbq oso lik dat...haha chun yang called mi leacher... haa shld change tis habit bah....hehe...

yesterdae .... mi words sounds a little insultin i tink... so sori so sori... i will try to change...

haha ltr gona fetch mi dad hehehe....

2006-11-27T21:59:00.001+08:00

hi haha yesterdae jus cum bac from camp...

camp was quite fun though nice games played... veri interestin.... haha three cheers for the sec 3... haha i felt veri useless nvr help much... jus do all the moppin hope dey dun mind.... haha actually had to do sentry duty but too tired sleep liaoxx... sori guys... veri sori.... didnt sleep much too lar... cos too cold and floor too hard....always rmb OH REALLY... sy ching may and regina created one....

haha den i cum bac home bathe and sleep...

from 6 to 9 the nxt morning i den woke up... haha i pig rite hehe too tired ler cant help it.... hehe to dae sent mi dad off... haha tis tym he rmb his passport ler.... den later went to eat pepper lunch....haha rush it cos bro had to go band.... den went to tts again.... haha i lazy nvr get out off car sleep inside... haha pig.... rite.... den cum bac home ler lor... learn mi piano haixxx... tiring lar...haha make mi own ice cream waffle and eat quite nice lar...

dats all bah... hehe tmr still got party

2006-11-22T22:39:00.000+08:00

haha... here again

yesterdae veri early wake up ler... haha go fetch mi dad to airport...he goin shanghai.... haix wun see him when he cum bac cos i go camp haixxx.... i cum bac camp he will be thailand ler... i will miss u dad...haha he forgot to tak his passport... we u turn bac giv him... den later went to joggin haha for so long mi family wana jog now den reali jog.... haha... went play bball den went mac eat breakfast... later went to sch for stupid rehearsal... haixx... tis rehearsal make mi sooo angry lor... no body wana listen the play lik shit haixxx... cl die ler lar....

todae went to council ... late again as usual... i not late not mi ler lar haa.... den do those deco do not much but got lots of dirt.... haha den went slackin ... went to eat dessert wif shi yuan.... haha mi beloved mei.... i want to order tiramisu one but den it look digustin den i order strawberry chesscake... not bad bah...but the plain water veri interestin sour one....den went bac sch wait for bro and den go sakae and eat... wow damn full.....

haha... health gettin a little worse but not as worse as ppl i noe... so maybe i can heal better and faster bah... dun even noe wat happen to mi.... haixxx nvrm....

2006-11-19T20:26:00.000+08:00

hi... long tym no write ler... haha 2 wks of study over ler.... so happi but now veri sianxx....

okie mani things to blog... first vivo.... haha went wif sherry, pak meng, jaslin... haha found out dat wif sherry veri alike haha both of us lov to go toyrus hahahahahha.... i dunnoe y just luv to go these kind of place ... i feel relax again.... haixxx... play wif swords skippin rope some kiddie computer.. i lik dat oso hapi...haha...den ltr anyhow shop shop lor... haha sherry took mi tie and play ...haha as usual her actions mak pakkie and jas angry....haha....

haha... den 3e4 chalet...hehehehe quite fun lar... nobody no how to start fire... so had to wait for our monitor Clement... haha he veri nasty lor ask him start fire ... he go play fire wif sophia hahaa.... ate some food but not much... hehe i brought the fried rice eat finish liaox i tink cos i nvr c any when i left... den later went to watch tv... haix not veri nice cos watch ler... haha saw jont roller coaster tycoon... haha i had to sae he quite pro at it... haha one thing veri funi de... he kept talkin to his laptop... jont shall i sent to the mentl hospital haha... jkjk... dun be angry hor...

haix... just send the message... hope he understand ..... haixx.... i dunnoe y but it hurts mi when i wrote it... hurt badly... now not much mood.... i reali hope i did the rite thing i reali dunnoe if tis is correct haixx... i reali hate to do tis but i noe i hav to...

2006-11-08T05:39:00.000+08:00

new blog skin... it true i am lookin for freedom... i reali wan it ... now i am stuck in tis cage....haixxx.....

haha gd news i can go sec four ler... veri happi onli fail two sub.... oso no re exam for mi... hooray...

hehe another gd news.. but tis not much ppl will noe wat i sae... i gradurate from tts ler... haha but den veri funi lar.. i oso nvr tak those medicine offically shld not gradurate...hehe

lastly... wish the sec 4 all the best for their olvl....
haha nxt yr mi turn.... i dun wan olvl....

2006-10-15T18:17:00.000+08:00

haha long tym nvr update... abt one month ler bah... haixxx... mani things happen though not to mi but still alot....

okie first exam over ler hahaha... but den i dun noe y dun feel dat it is ... i felt dat everything is jus the beginning reali... haixx... dunnoe y but lik dat lor.... i tink i gona fail but i reali dun wan...

yea weather sux.. haze so much... haha mi 'old pal' bac... i am sick again.... wats happening to mi i am sick but i cant go to c doc... haixxx...

haix.... bro's temper cum again... mum temper cum again...haixx.... cant he jus understand.... and cant she jus understand wat mi and mi another bro wan... we jus wan a little more freedom... now wat... drinks at home mus count... each person 2 can a dae... i noe dat will happen... haixxx when would i be free....

lastly...u... haixxx i dunnoe wat am i feelin now... do i luv u or wat... i dunnoe shld i luv u or not... i tink i shld not... cos mani ppl told mi to... i dunnoe lar.... jus hope dat by 20 oct i will tell u.... haixx... i am confused by u....

now mi life has 4 things to solve... study... health.... parents....and one more...

2006-09-17T21:13:00.000+08:00

haha... one week go soo fast... veri busy week... hehe.... haha gd news to share tests all passin.. haha more hope of enterin sec 4 nxt yr ler... hehe felicia heng mus jia you hoh.... haha....

hehe tis wk veri fun lar... dunnoe y... kinda down but always lots of ppl around mi cheer mi up noeily and unnoeily haha but thnks to all...

haha found sth new too... dad friends is maybe the technician i hate the i mi sch ahhhh.... WTF... i hate mi to the core....

hehe ... it ink for long i wun be bloggin and online ler... cos had to study... yea see u aft exams... hope i bring gd news... bye....

2006-09-10T17:20:00.000+08:00

hixx... holidaes gona over soon... haha hapi but sad too... cant slack ler... but very happi to meet my friends again...

haisss... hw haven finished yet.. i dun intend to finished it.... haha...

ahhh went to cut hair... yuckx it sux.... now i dunnoe look like wat... i did not tell the barber to cut mi fringe... okie maybe i did ... i told him to cut shoter jus trim can ler stlye de same... den guess wat he chip it off... now mi mum called mi jap gal and bro call mi a nerd ahahhahaha.... haixxx...

tis wk kinda relax lar... sometym a little sad but thnks for mani ppl besides mi... thnks for them to cheer mi up... i tot it over i tink it was a misunderstanding... thnks bro... if not for him i will not noe the truth... thnks.... i tink i shld forget all this .... lets move on....

haixx... stomach pain again dunnoe y... achin deeply and sharply... when would it stop...
haha gona see mi grandmother ltr...haha

I had to move on

2006-09-04T20:56:00.000+08:00

haixxx... soo siannnxxx..... nth to do at home... all i do is hw... heehee...

haha... wow went bac to xps... haha did not expect them to be there... heehee cos i hav dat stupid bio spa... den tot too late liaoxx... but den not happi so went to try mi luck heehee dey still dere... haha so hapi... met mani gals guys not much... dey all go home ler... haiss.... every yr oso lik dat i cant meet the guys one... cos i so late den cum mah hahhaha.... heehee... junyi as cheerful as b4... hwee ying as crazy as last tym.... lydia y u grow taller... heehee mr gomez still the same lar... hahaha... i miss mi pri sch mates.... luv them lots... i want to meet them again.... heehee...

hahha... hwee ying sae i change ler becum happier ler... i always tinkin ... it is true... maybe bah... but anyway dats a gd news... haha... maybe i now more vocal ler... outspoken ler bah...heehee....

i dun care u ler... whether friends or not... we are all over... realli i hate to care anymore i realli hurts me... i noe i had to move on... bb

hope i stay as happi as eva

2006-08-26T21:03:00.000+08:00

haixx... tis week everybody seems to pissed mi off...yup but dats not the main idea for tis post...

haixx council.... i tink i shld get out off council.... from the dae i step in til now i did not did much... yea maybe alot lar... everydae do duty lor... haixx... besides dat nth ler.. i recess oic oso cant do properly do alreadi means no do wat for... i reali tink i shld quit... i feel dat stayin in council seems lik i veri ai shi... dunnoe lar... not onli tis mum wana mi to quit.. cause of studies... so since i nvr do much for council might as well quit.... but everytym tink of tis i would cry... i dun wan tis to happen... y mus tis happen... i love council alot... it brings mi joy reali... it giv mi hope... but now all hav to be gone...

seriouly for u i had done alot... get out of a comfortable school to a high demanding school... drop many other interests and dreams to pursue ur expectations something dat i dun lik.... but i try real hard and when i cant acheive it... u scolded mi wats tis...i cant live in tis life anymore....

2006-08-12T19:28:00.000+08:00

haixxx.... sad and tiring wk.... heehee....

ms lam leave us ler... leave 3e4 ler.... i veri sad haixxx.... cant realli hav fun during party cause veri sick... sick @ the wrong tym man... haixxx... mi body i oso cant control lar.... haixxxxx..... wanted to stay happy and healthy... but cant... so would rather be alone....dun spoil other ppl mood.... ytd vomit dizzy weak breatheless.... haixx.... mani more lar.... sori 4 makin sooo mani ppl worry...

anyway todae better lar.... go see doc.... he sae i jus suffer from dehydration...wow frist tym heard dat ppl lik mi will suffer from dehydration hahaha... den giv mi wat rehydration salts and mani others.... woah now i seem lik hav to tak sooo mani medicine haha....

oh yea... ytd was jin kai last dae in sch oso.... haha celebrate together wif ms lam.... heehee.... some of the 2e3 took pic wif him haha.... cant join cause sick mah.... haha... heard he got a veri choi gf in state.... heehee... i wonder how she looks anyway wish him all the best...

hope we still can be friends...

2006-08-09T20:59:00.000+08:00

haahaa.... long tym no blog ler.... heehee.... change blogskins... tis means to mi life alot now...

okie first happi bd singapore .... watch the NDP luv the fireworks lots....

tis two wk happen lots of thing too much ler.... mainly sad stuff.... but i am strong these two wk still can take it hope nxt wk and the wk after is beta...

oh yea ytd cross country i nvr run did council duty... fun though.... but tiring had to carry all the belongings haixxx...

lasty i want to thnk u... telling mi the ans.... no matter wat wish u gd luc....

hope i get over wif it....

2006-07-29T20:49:00.000+08:00

haahaa.... tis wk huh... nth much lar...

oh yea... some bad and sad stuff.... mi health cum again.... haixx... while goin bac home i almost wanted to faint... i cant stand it lar... onli walk from sch to mrt oso feel lik faintin... wat kinda health i hav... idiot one i tink... luckily for a friend help mi... thnks... i tink i realli gota excercise more ler... if not surely walk on the street faint oso no one noe...

yea... miss lam leaving.... although i am not soo close to her... but she thought us for at lest 7 mths... you gan qing... hais dunnoe whether new ama teacher gd or not...

lastly i burn mi tongue... now still sooo pain... eat fish bee hoon den burn one... haixxx... ouch....

haahaa... ytd hav lit dat tym... heeehee our movie was screen... i tink its not bad ler... haahaa... we crap for our presentation... miss ow still sae definitely a A huh... ai yah nvrm lar... hope other groups can do better...

*i cant wait any longer*

2006-07-24T04:17:00.000+08:00

haahaa... long tym nvr c u blog...heehee to busy liao no tym to update...

haixx... tis wk is not for mi... kept feelin lik cryin.... life is all alone... @ sch and even @ home... i had no one to turn to....tis wk oso a wk full of scoldin... i start off mi wk wif the 1st demerit i eva got in mi life... cos i nvr hand in dat stupid cip form.... den one dae of not bringin ex book... den got suan by mr lee... i dunnoe y but jus felt soo angry anf i 1st tym giv a little attitude to a teacher... den piano teacher turns... shout rite into mi ears... den ballet teacher scold mi for anyhow change class... den bac at home... teow meh by mi bro and mum.... i tok to miself onli and mi bro scolded mi... haixxx.... wats tis....

at home... life cums again..... mum still unhappy abt mi dad.... dad kept drinkin when he noes he is not suppose too... i realli want to help dad... but i dunnoe how.... i am tired of hearin mi mum scoldin and saein dad infront of us... y cant mi family be happi lik the past... y mus we mak life sooo diffcult for us... mani ppl may think y i shld not bother wif mi family... i shld focus more on studies and friends... tis is more important in sec sch life.... BUT NO.... i wun.... i love mi family more than anything.... i realli care for mi family more than anything.... i tink no body would understand....

haahaa...tok some fun stuff lar.... COUNCIL ROCKS.... COUNCIL INVESTITURE ROCKS.... haahaaa... i took deyi sec as mi guests.... heehee... is one guy and one gal..... name sean and huihui... heehee.... sean veri crappy... a joker hu lov to make ppl laugh... huihui is shy at first... but in the end she okie... haha... dey are veri fun lot to be wif... council inveatiture itself was fun... haha... the students laugh alot dunnoe for wat.... anyway... i almost fall down when singing... becos dunnoe hu the hell always tryin to squeze mi ajnd then pull mi soo far apart... haha... but still fun lar... heehee.. the interaction tym in homec room and i cube room was fun.... oh yea one of our council did magic tricks... heehee... he can becum our sing david copperfield haha...

COUNCIL ROCKS

sori for long post.... heehee... oh yea thnks sherry...

*the day has come*

2006-07-12T04:53:00.000+08:00

haixxx.... sad week.... i dunnoe wat to do.... haixxx... whole wk everthing is sad.... family and friends prob alll cum... sometimes studies too.... y ... y tis happpen ... wat i hav done wrong.... alll mi life .... i knew i did not exist... realli i felicia heng nvr exist in tis whole.... haixxx.... i am tooo tired to carry on... carry on a life dats sooo tough.... i realli dunnoe wat to do every now and then... i break down... almost becumin insane... when i am sad no one knows.... when i am angry.... no one cares..... when i am happi no one to share.... not even mi family... wat kind of life is tis... isolation... yup maybe...y... i am fated to be lonely all the way through.... pri sch is lik dat sec sch oso... i am tired of being alone.... i dunwan to go through mi life alone... wat hav i done wrong... y am i faaated to tis life... mi bro all had mani caring and gd friends but mi ... i realli dunnoe.... i dunnoe hu to trust... i dunnoe hu to look... now... i realli wish i can sleep 4eva and nvr wake up... so i would nvr eva nid to face tis again....
I NVR EXIST IN TIS WORLD....

*waiting for u*

2006-06-22T18:29:00.000+08:00

haahaa... jus cum bac from camp sorta of lar... yesterdae cum bac....

i miss nacli camp...
it was soooo shiok....
mainly all i can sae tis camp let us be as one council again....
hahaa...
the shoe factory... water games...MAD
200 sec challenge...triangular captian ball...
mani mani outdoor games lar...cherilyn led us in these game
haha...
learn lots of things abt life too from louis...
"Everybody has a kid in them and we should not lose it"
"You do or you don't there is no try"

heard dat bedok view was scared off by our school song...
haha...
didnt noe we sang sooo loud...
the guys at the bac still make the intro tune...
haha...
soo funi lar..

den i rmb everyone of us lik hungry ghost lik dat...
bread for 3 daes one dae can eat finish...
until louis hav to buy pandan cake for us...
oh yea... sy hapi bd...
we celebrate sy bd...
whole council sang bd song...
and louis bought cake for her...
den cream was put on ppl face haha...

oh mi bedroom...
it was sooo shiok...
i did not want to get up...
but it was too cold lar...
haha...

lastly mi team...
haha...
got a bunch of funni disgustin guys(oswell, chun yang and ian)...
but dey are veri friendly and nice...
thnks guys for the skit...
thnks team for everything....
although the dance was not veri great...
but we tried our best...
and enjoyed ourselves...

haahaa... while goin bac home...
we all tryin to hitch hike...
haha.. almost the whole council do dat...
den ltr some of us decide to go harbour font tak..
but bus cum on the other stop we chasin it...
haha... i fell into the drain again
no wonder ppl call mi fall down queen...
haha... den we fool the others...
we look lik the whole bus is ours...
laughin and shoutin lik siao..
yipeee....

*looking out for u*

2006-06-13T19:18:00.000+08:00

haha... abt one week i nvr write in ler....

heehee... jus cum bac from hair salon...
mi new hairstyle suxxx esp when i tie it up...
mi fringe look wierd...

last sundae... i had a great fun...
met up wif some old time friends...
play bball together...haha...
humph.... i cant get the ball but let the ball hit mi....
and dat stupid jing de ... soo tall for wat...
always get mi ball...
haha...

yesterdae...
i had fun dancing...
although i was not chossen to perform for the final performance..
but i was hapi...
because i enjoyed it..
i noe i not gd at dancin but...
i jus luv it...
no one can stop mi from dancin...
haha....

lastly ...
i hate holidae...
it make mi miss sooo mani ppl...
esp... sherry and shi yuan...
haixxx...
den holidae y mus sooo busy lik dat...
almost everydae go bac sch....
if not hav to do hw...

*getting closer*

2006-06-05T20:55:00.000+08:00

I HATE TODAE....

todae is mi worst family outin eva...
worst movie dae eva...
i cant stand everybody....
is lik i just wan the whole family to be together much better..
but wat..
it turn out worst...
and wat it is all mi fault...
i noe mum wan to go out and shop....
so i sae yes...
den wat bro angry..
wat dey wan..
i stay at home veri bored ler..
dey got com but i dun play com..
i WAN TO GO OUT...

i dunnoe lar...
all mi life is tryin to please ppl..
nobody eva tried to please mi...
nobody...
i am tired ....
4 15 years...
i live in darkness...
live in loneliness...
live in pain...
live in accusation...
and nobody noe...
nobody care...
in sch i m all alone...
at home oso...
wat is tis...
i hate to live lik tis...
go home...
wan to talk to mum..
she dun understand..
wan to talk to bro...
he tease or talk crap wif mi..
wan to talk to dad..
hes out...
den wat..
all i do is face four walll..
got family lik no lik dat...
no i dun even hav....
friends haixxxx...
i hack care ler lar..
i am alone..
from young..
for 15 yr n 6 mth....
sad... angry... hapi...
all miself...

all i wan is someone hu care... reali care...
haixxx....
i tink until i die i oso cant find tis ppl...

tooo pisssed off...
i wan to run lik hell.... scream wif all mi might....
throw every ting all about....
hack care hit hu ler....

yea i hate todae...
i do everyting but no one noe...
yet accuse sae i nvr do it...
wat is tis..
i trust mi family the most..
and dey dun understand mi haixx....

2006-06-04T22:50:00.000+08:00

haha.... tis wk abit sianzz lar... but dunnoe y veri hapi ler... laugh whole dae....

haha... jus past dat fridae....
go cous house...
long tym no go ler...
zhong yu can see mi beloved cous...kelly....
and all mi nephew and niece...
haha.. all of them veri cute....
now mi joey niece noe alot of words ler...
haha... i and mi bro dere teachin her oso....
haha.... aftre mi dinner....
i lik baby sister lik dat...
tak care alot of babies...
erm... got four to five bah....
hahaha... soo mang...
but i lik being wif them....
ai yoh.... i shui ai de jin kai newphew....
veri veri naughty....
haixxx cant help lar...
he jus wan attention...
last tym hav alot.... but now got one mei mei den all gone ler...
but he bit ppl ler...
so i scolded him lor..
he soo scared....
haha..
i miss the most important part...
it is to sing hapi bd to mi uncle..
haha..
sori i was downstairs wif kelly cous...
tooo busy liaox...
haha... both of us long tym no c chat alot...
how i wish...i can hav another gathering wif mi cous again....
esp... vivien...n... kelly...

*right here waiting for u*

2006-06-01T22:10:00.000+08:00

haixxx.... tis week abit sianxx....

all i do is revision and lookin through blog.....
i look around found out something....
everybody will had a point of time that they are soooo down...
that dey wana die or alreadi lose themselves....
haixx... i understand how dey feel but i cant an wei them....
i miself oso hav tis feelin...

i hav always been a loner ...
but i dun wan tis...
i will feel veri painful....
all alone all dae....
yeh too mani ppl or teacher tinks i m cheerful...
but to miself i m not...
i did a test on the web...
i was 38% happi...
i tink it is quite true...
haixxx.... dunnoe lar....
i jus hope i will be hapi and optimistic lik last tym again...
(i mean when i was lik p3 dat tym)....
i dunwan to grow up....

haixx... i dun feel well....
vomit all dae...
eat den vomit...
now i writin tis oso feel lik vomitin...
may eat too much ba chang ler...

oh yea.... change blog song....
luv tis song alot....
it links to mi quite alot...

*I could live on loving you*

2006-05-28T17:34:00.000+08:00

haixxx.... ytd went for parents meetin... haiss...

i knew wif tis results of mine ....
teacher n even mi parents want mi to quit council...
haixx... but i jus dun wan tis to happen...
i noe dey wei wo hao...
but i reali luv council alot...
is it part of mi dream...
for long i always wanted to serve the sch ...
i hav it and i wan to keep it...
haixxx...
council let mi hav fun... meet new friends...
most importantly... it made mi feel that i am livin more meaningfully...
haixxx.... i will reali cry if i left .... reali i will cry soo hard dat my eyes will go blind...
i reali luv council alot...
everything dere...
wat we do ... the ppl...
i will reali gona miss all of u...
haixx....
will my dream will stilll be true... will it still stay...

*luvin you*